HuntingNut
HuntingNut
   Login or Register
HomeCommunity ForumsPhoto AlbumsRegister
     
 

User Info

Welcome Anonymous


Membership:
Latest: IPutMoInYoA
New Today: 0
New Yesterday: 0
Overall: 13131

People Online:
Members: 0
Visitors: 403
BOT: 3
Total: 406
Who Is Where:
 Visitors:
01: Forums
02: Forums
03: Forums
04: Forums
05: Forums
06: Forums
07: Forums
08: Forums
09: Forums
10: Your Account
11: Forums
12: Forums
13: Photo Albums
14: Forums
15: Forums
16: Forums
17: Home
18: Forums
19: Statistics
20: Forums
21: Forums
22: Forums
23: Photo Albums
24: Forums
25: Forums
26: Forums
27: Your Account
28: Home
29: Forums
30: Forums
31: Your Account
32: Your Account
33: Home
34: Home
35: Your Account
36: Forums
37: Forums
38: Forums
39: Your Account
40: Forums
41: Forums
42: Forums
43: Forums
44: Forums
45: Forums
46: Your Account
47: Forums
48: Forums
49: Forums
50: Forums
51: Forums
52: Your Account
53: Forums
54: Forums
55: Home
56: Forums
57: Photo Albums
58: Forums
59: Your Account
60: Forums
61: Forums
62: Forums
63: Forums
64: Forums
65: Home
66: Forums
67: Forums
68: Forums
69: Forums
70: Forums
71: Home
72: Forums
73: Forums
74: Your Account
75: Forums
76: Your Account
77: Forums
78: Home
79: Forums
80: Forums
81: Your Account
82: Forums
83: Your Account
84: Forums
85: Forums
86: Forums
87: Photo Albums
88: Forums
89: Forums
90: Forums
91: Your Account
92: Your Account
93: Forums
94: Forums
95: Forums
96: Forums
97: Forums
98: Forums
99: Forums
100: Forums
101: Forums
102: Home
103: Forums
104: Your Account
105: Forums
106: Home
107: Forums
108: Photo Albums
109: Forums
110: Forums
111: Photo Albums
112: Forums
113: Forums
114: Forums
115: Forums
116: Forums
117: Photo Albums
118: Forums
119: Home
120: Forums
121: Home
122: Forums
123: Forums
124: Forums
125: Forums
126: Home
127: Forums
128: Forums
129: Forums
130: Forums
131: Forums
132: Forums
133: Your Account
134: Photo Albums
135: Forums
136: Your Account
137: Your Account
138: Forums
139: Forums
140: Reloading Database
141: Forums
142: Your Account
143: Forums
144: Forums
145: Forums
146: Forums
147: Forums
148: Forums
149: Forums
150: Forums
151: Forums
152: Forums
153: Forums
154: Forums
155: Your Account
156: Forums
157: Your Account
158: Photo Albums
159: Home
160: Home
161: Forums
162: Forums
163: Forums
164: Forums
165: Forums
166: Forums
167: Home
168: Forums
169: Forums
170: Forums
171: Forums
172: Forums
173: Photo Albums
174: Photo Albums
175: Home
176: Your Account
177: Photo Albums
178: Forums
179: Forums
180: Forums
181: Home
182: Forums
183: Forums
184: Home
185: Home
186: Forums
187: Forums
188: Forums
189: Photo Albums
190: Forums
191: Forums
192: Forums
193: Forums
194: Forums
195: Your Account
196: Forums
197: Forums
198: Forums
199: Forums
200: Forums
201: Forums
202: Forums
203: Forums
204: Home
205: Forums
206: Forums
207: Forums
208: Photo Albums
209: Your Account
210: Forums
211: Forums
212: Forums
213: Photo Albums
214: Photo Albums
215: Forums
216: Home
217: Forums
218: Your Account
219: Forums
220: Home
221: Home
222: Your Account
223: Home
224: Your Account
225: Photo Albums
226: Home
227: Forums
228: Forums
229: Forums
230: Forums
231: Forums
232: Forums
233: Your Account
234: Forums
235: Forums
236: Home
237: Photo Albums
238: Forums
239: Forums
240: Forums
241: Forums
242: Forums
243: Home
244: Home
245: Forums
246: Forums
247: Forums
248: Forums
249: Forums
250: Photo Albums
251: Forums
252: Photo Albums
253: Forums
254: Your Account
255: Home
256: Forums
257: Home
258: Forums
259: Your Account
260: Forums
261: Forums
262: Home
263: Forums
264: Forums
265: Forums
266: Forums
267: Forums
268: Your Account
269: Home
270: Home
271: Forums
272: Photo Albums
273: Your Account
274: Photo Albums
275: Forums
276: Forums
277: Home
278: Forums
279: Forums
280: Forums
281: Home
282: Home
283: Forums
284: Home
285: Home
286: Forums
287: Forums
288: Forums
289: Forums
290: Your Account
291: Forums
292: Forums
293: Home
294: Forums
295: Your Account
296: Forums
297: Home
298: Forums
299: Your Account
300: Forums
301: Forums
302: Home
303: Forums
304: Forums
305: Forums
306: Home
307: Forums
308: Forums
309: Forums
310: Home
311: Forums
312: Your Account
313: Your Account
314: Forums
315: Photo Albums
316: Forums
317: Forums
318: Forums
319: Forums
320: Forums
321: Photo Albums
322: Home
323: Forums
324: Home
325: Forums
326: Forums
327: Forums
328: Photo Albums
329: Forums
330: Forums
331: Forums
332: Forums
333: Home
334: Forums
335: Forums
336: Forums
337: Forums
338: Forums
339: Forums
340: Photo Albums
341: Forums
342: Forums
343: Photo Albums
344: Forums
345: Forums
346: Forums
347: Forums
348: Your Account
349: Forums
350: Home
351: Forums
352: Forums
353: Forums
354: Forums
355: Your Account
356: Forums
357: Home
358: Your Account
359: Forums
360: Forums
361: Forums
362: Forums
363: Forums
364: Forums
365: Forums
366: Home
367: Forums
368: Your Account
369: Forums
370: Forums
371: Home
372: Forums
373: Your Account
374: Forums
375: Forums
376: Home
377: Your Account
378: Forums
379: Forums
380: Your Account
381: Forums
382: Your Account
383: Forums
384: Home
385: Forums
386: Your Account
387: Forums
388: Forums
389: Forums
390: Your Account
391: Forums
392: Your Account
393: Forums
394: Home
395: Forums
396: Home
397: Your Account
398: Forums
399: Home
400: Forums
401: Forums
402: Home
403: Forums
  BOT:
01: Home
02: Forums
03: Home

Staff Online:

No staff members are online!
 

Coppermine Stats
Photo Albums
 Albums: 308
 Pictures: 2452
  · Views: 824091
  · Votes: 1316
  · Comments: 86
 

Adopt A Terrorist -
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
Post new topic   Reply to topic   Printer Friendly Page    Forum Index » Jokes & Humor

View previous topic :: View next topic  
Author Message
inthedark
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jan 31, 2011
Posts: 913
Location: Ontario

PostPosted: Sun Jan 22, 2012 10:26 pm    Post subject: Adopt A Terrorist - Reply with quote

Shocked Shocked
A female Canadian libertarian wrote a lot of letters to the government, complaining about the treatment of captive insurgents (terrorists) being held in Afghanistan National Correctional System facilities.
She is said to have received the following reply:

National Defence Headquarters
MGen George R. Pearkes Bldg, 15 NT
101 Colonel By Drive
Ottawa, ON K1A 0K2
Canada


Dear Concerned Citizen,
Thank you for your recent letter expressing your profound concern of treatment of the Taliban and Al Qaeda terrorists captured by Canadian Forces - who were subsequently transferred to the Afghanistan Government and are currently being held by Afghan officials in Afghanistan National Correctional System facilities.
Our administration takes these matters seriously and your opinions were heard loud and clear here in Ottawa .
You will be pleased to learn, thanks to the concerns of citizens like yourself; we are creating a new Department here at the Department of National Defence, to be called 'Liberals Accept Responsibility for Killers' program, or L.A.R.K. For short.
In accordance with the guidelines of this new program, we have decided to divert one terrorist and place him in your personal care.
Your personal detainee has been selected and is scheduled for transportation under heavily armed guard to your residence in Toronto next Monday.
Ali Mohammed Ahmed bin Mahmud (you can just call him Ahmed) is to be cared for pursuant to the standards you personally demanded in your letter of complaint.
It will likely be necessary for you to hire some assistant caretakers. We will conduct weekly inspections to ensure that your standards of care for Ahmed are commensurate with those you so strongly recommend in your letter.
Although Ahmed is a sociopath and extremely violent, we hope that your sensitivity to what you described as his "attitudinal problem " will help him overcome these character flaws.
Perhaps you are correct in describing these problems as mere cultural differences.
We understand that you plan to offer counselling and home schooling.
Your adopted terrorist is extremely proficient in hand-to-hand combat and can extinguish human life with such simple items as a pencil or nail clippers.
We advise that you do not ask him to demonstrate these skills at your next yoga group.
He is also expert at making a wide variety of explosive devices from common household products, so you may wish to keep those items locked up, unless (in your opinion) this might offend him.
Ahmed will not wish to interact with you or your daughters (except sexually) since he views females as a subhuman form of property.
This is a particularly sensitive subject for him and he has been known to show violent tendencies around women who fail to comply with the new dress code that he will recommend as more appropriate attire.
I'm sure you will come to enjoy the anonymity offered by the burka over time. Just remember that it is all part of 'respecting his culture and religious beliefs' as described in your letter.
Thanks again for your concern. We truly appreciate it when folks like you keep us informed of the proper way to do our job and care for our fellow man.
You take good care of Ahmed - and remember we'll be watching.
Good luck and God bless you.
Cordially,
Gordon O'Connor
Minister of National Defense
wtf Shocked

_________________
Chimo
Ron

War is sweet to those who have no experience of it, but the experienced man trembles exceedingly at heart on its approach - Pindar 518-438 BC

Be Copy now of Men of Grosser Blood and TEACH THEM HOW TO WAR
Back to top
View user's profile Photo Gallery
Vince
Site Admin
Site Admin


Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 15715
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Mon Jan 23, 2012 1:25 am    Post subject: Re: Adopt A Terrorist - Reply with quote

Oh, I like it mate...can I watch, can I watch huh huh..can I? Laughing Laughing Laughing

Cheers, Vince

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
Back to top
View user's profile AIM Address MSN Messenger Yahoo Messenger Photo Gallery
lesterg3
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Nov 30, 2008
Posts: 1328
Location: Dixie

PostPosted: Mon Jan 23, 2012 4:58 am    Post subject: Re: Adopt A Terrorist - Reply with quote

If only it were true.

_________________
"A democracy is nothing more than mob rule, where fifty-one percent of the people may take away the rights of the other forty-nine. "--Thomas Jefferson

The strongest reason for the people to retain the right to keep and bear arms is, as a last resort, to protect themselves against tyranny in government. -- Thomas Jefferson

"Americans have the right and advantage of being armed - unlike the citizens of other countries whose governments are afraid to trust the people with arms."--James Madison

"The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants." Thomas Jefferson.

NRA Life Member
Vietnam War Vet 68-69
Back to top
View user's profile Send e-mail Photo Gallery
Ominivision1
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Sep 20, 2010
Posts: 2984
Location: Iowa

PostPosted: Mon Jan 23, 2012 6:39 am    Post subject: Re: Adopt A Terrorist - Reply with quote

This would be to good for the liberals.

_________________
Regards

Limitations are but boundaries created inside our minds.
Back to top
View user's profile Photo Gallery
Dimitri
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Nov 25, 2005
Posts: 5944

PostPosted: Wed Jan 25, 2012 8:05 pm    Post subject: Re: Adopt A Terrorist - Reply with quote

Oddly enough Mr. O'Conner has been switched out from Minister of Defence to Chief Government Whip.

Very Happy

Dimitri

_________________
A thousand hills, but no birds in flight, ten thousand paths, with no people's tracks. A lonely boat, a straw-hatted old man, fishing alone in the cold river snow.
Back to top
View user's profile Photo Gallery
inthedark
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jan 31, 2011
Posts: 913
Location: Ontario

PostPosted: Wed Jan 25, 2012 8:49 pm    Post subject: Re: Adopt A Terrorist - Reply with quote

I know that and the letter was written some time ago and
NOT I should surmise by Mr O'Conner. It is still a good laugh.

_________________
Chimo
Ron

War is sweet to those who have no experience of it, but the experienced man trembles exceedingly at heart on its approach - Pindar 518-438 BC

Be Copy now of Men of Grosser Blood and TEACH THEM HOW TO WAR
Back to top
View user's profile Photo Gallery
RePete
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Aug 15, 2005
Posts: 1035
Location: Gods Country

PostPosted: Thu Jan 26, 2012 6:44 pm    Post subject: Re: Adopt A Terrorist - Reply with quote

I seen that from 3 different countries, Canada, US and Britain.

_________________
Proud member of the WTFDTSG Club.

Stercus Accidit = Sh*t Happens in Latin.

Nice try = You Suck spelled different.

My parents spanked me as a child. As a result, I now suffer from a psychological condition known as RESPECT FOR OTHERS.
Back to top
View user's profile
metz3601
Member
Member


Joined: Oct 31, 2008
Posts: 81

PostPosted: Thu Jan 26, 2012 11:11 pm    Post subject: Re: Adopt A Terrorist - Reply with quote

Where do I sign up to "Adopt" one of these guys? Wonder how thorough the investigation will be when he "slips out of my custody" in the middle of the night??
Back to top
View user's profile Photo Gallery
Vince
Site Admin
Site Admin


Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 15715
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Thu Jan 26, 2012 11:53 pm    Post subject: Re: Adopt A Terrorist - Reply with quote

That's when you are out deep sea fishing isn't it Metz? Wink Wink

Cheers, Vince

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
Back to top
View user's profile AIM Address MSN Messenger Yahoo Messenger Photo Gallery
Elvis
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jul 27, 2008
Posts: 9253
Location: south island New Zealand

PostPosted: Fri Jan 27, 2012 4:26 am    Post subject: Re: Adopt A Terrorist - Reply with quote

bacon and eggs for breakfast everyday.

_________________
You shot it You pluck it !
Them who eats the most duck eats the most feathers!
Back to top
View user's profile
Vince
Site Admin
Site Admin


Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 15715
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Fri Jan 27, 2012 4:46 am    Post subject: Re: Adopt A Terrorist - Reply with quote

Elvis wrote:
bacon and eggs for breakfast everyday.

...with HAM salad for lunch and Roast PORK for dinner...everyday.

Cheers, Vince

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
Back to top
View user's profile AIM Address MSN Messenger Yahoo Messenger Photo Gallery
inthedark
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jan 31, 2011
Posts: 913
Location: Ontario

PostPosted: Fri Jan 27, 2012 11:11 pm    Post subject: Re: Adopt A Terrorist - Reply with quote

metz3601 wrote:
Where do I sign up to "Adopt" one of these guys? Wonder how thorough the investigation will be when he "slips out of my custody" in the middle of the night??

And the roses seem to bloom all the more vividly! ROFL The Wave

_________________
Chimo
Ron

War is sweet to those who have no experience of it, but the experienced man trembles exceedingly at heart on its approach - Pindar 518-438 BC

Be Copy now of Men of Grosser Blood and TEACH THEM HOW TO WAR
Back to top
View user's profile Photo Gallery
Display posts from previous:   
Post new topic   Reply to topic   Printer Friendly Page    Forum Index » Jokes & Humor
Page 1 of 1
All times are GMT - 7 Hours



Jump to:  


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum
You cannot attach files in this forum
You cannot download files in this forum


Valid CSS! Valid HTML 4.01!
Click to check if this page is realy HTML 4.01 compliant for speed :)

All logos and trademarks in this site are property of HuntingNut.com.
The comments are property of their posters, all the rest © 2011 by HuntingNut.com
Interactive software released under GNU GPL, Code Credits, Privacy Policy

.: Upgraded to DragonFly 9.2 by *Dizfunkshunal* :.