HuntingNut
HuntingNut
   Login or Register
HomeCommunity ForumsPhoto AlbumsRegister
     
 

User Info

Welcome Anonymous


Membership:
Latest: IPutMoInYoA
New Today: 0
New Yesterday: 0
Overall: 13131

People Online:
Members: 0
Visitors: 207
BOT: 2
Total: 209
Who Is Where:
 Visitors:
01: Forums
02: Forums
03: Home
04: Home
05: Forums
06: Home
07: Home
08: Forums
09: Forums
10: Home
11: Forums
12: Your Account
13: Forums
14: Photo Albums
15: Forums
16: Photo Albums
17: Your Account
18: Photo Albums
19: Forums
20: Forums
21: Home
22: Forums
23: Forums
24: Photo Albums
25: Forums
26: Your Account
27: Your Account
28: Forums
29: Forums
30: Forums
31: Home
32: Forums
33: Photo Albums
34: Photo Albums
35: Forums
36: Home
37: Forums
38: Photo Albums
39: Forums
40: Forums
41: Your Account
42: Forums
43: Forums
44: Forums
45: Forums
46: Forums
47: Forums
48: Photo Albums
49: Home
50: Forums
51: Forums
52: Your Account
53: Forums
54: Forums
55: Forums
56: Your Account
57: Home
58: Home
59: Home
60: Home
61: Your Account
62: Forums
63: Forums
64: Home
65: Home
66: Forums
67: Forums
68: Forums
69: Your Account
70: Forums
71: Forums
72: Your Account
73: Forums
74: Home
75: Home
76: Home
77: Photo Albums
78: Forums
79: Home
80: Forums
81: Photo Albums
82: Forums
83: Home
84: Your Account
85: Forums
86: Forums
87: Forums
88: Home
89: Forums
90: Home
91: Forums
92: Forums
93: Your Account
94: Home
95: Photo Albums
96: Home
97: Home
98: Forums
99: Your Account
100: Forums
101: Forums
102: Forums
103: Forums
104: Forums
105: Forums
106: Home
107: Forums
108: Home
109: Home
110: Photo Albums
111: Forums
112: Forums
113: Forums
114: Your Account
115: Forums
116: Home
117: Forums
118: News
119: Forums
120: Home
121: Home
122: Your Account
123: Forums
124: Forums
125: Forums
126: Forums
127: Forums
128: Forums
129: Photo Albums
130: Home
131: Forums
132: Forums
133: Forums
134: Forums
135: Home
136: Home
137: Forums
138: Home
139: Forums
140: Your Account
141: Forums
142: Forums
143: Photo Albums
144: Forums
145: Forums
146: Home
147: Photo Albums
148: Home
149: Forums
150: Forums
151: Forums
152: Forums
153: Forums
154: Forums
155: Forums
156: Forums
157: Your Account
158: Forums
159: Forums
160: Forums
161: Forums
162: Home
163: Forums
164: Forums
165: Forums
166: Photo Albums
167: Home
168: Forums
169: Your Account
170: Home
171: Your Account
172: Forums
173: Forums
174: Forums
175: Forums
176: Your Account
177: Forums
178: Forums
179: Forums
180: Your Account
181: Home
182: Home
183: Forums
184: Photo Albums
185: Forums
186: Home
187: Forums
188: Home
189: Forums
190: Photo Albums
191: Forums
192: Forums
193: Home
194: Your Account
195: Forums
196: Forums
197: Home
198: Forums
199: Forums
200: Forums
201: Forums
202: Forums
203: Forums
204: Home
205: Forums
206: Forums
207: Home
  BOT:
01: Forums
02: Forums

Staff Online:

No staff members are online!
 

Coppermine Stats
Photo Albums
 Albums: 308
 Pictures: 2452
  · Views: 824098
  · Votes: 1316
  · Comments: 86
 

What a woman wants
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
Post new topic   Reply to topic   Printer Friendly Page    Forum Index » Jokes & Humor

View previous topic :: View next topic  
Author Message
Vince
Site Admin
Site Admin


Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 15715
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Tue Sep 21, 2010 7:57 pm    Post subject: What a woman wants Reply with quote

What I Want In A Man!

Original List: age (20 something)

1. Handsome
2. Charming
3. Financially successful
4. A caring listener
5. Witty
6. In good shape
7. Dresses with style
8. Appreciates finer things
9. Full of thoughtful surprises

What I Want in a Man, Revised List (age 32)

1. Nice looking
2. Opens car doors, holds chairs
3. Has enough money for a nice dinner
4. Listens more than talks
5. Laughs at my jokes
6. Carries bags of groceries with ease
7. Owns at least one tie
8. Appreciates a good home-cooked meal
9. Remembers birthdays and anniversaries

What I Want in a Man, Revised List (age 42)

1. Not too ugly
2. Doesn't drive off until I'm in the car
3. Works steady - splurges on dinner out occasionally
4. Nods head when I'm talking
5. Usually remembers punch lines of jokes
6. Is in good enough shape to rearrange the furniture
7. Wears a shirt that covers his stomach
8. Knows not to buy champagne with screw-top lids
9. Remembers to put the toilet seat down
10. Shaves most weekends

What I Want in a Man, Revised List (age 52)

1. Keeps hair in nose and ears trimmed
2. Doesn't belch or scratch in public
3. Can tow a Caravan
4. Can cook a BBQ
5. Doesn't re-tell the same joke too many times
6. Appreciates a good TV dinner
7. Helps with the housework

What I Want in a Man, Revised List (age 62)

1. Doesn't scare small children
2. Remembers where I have put things
3. Can still tow a van without causing chaos on the road
4. Only snores lightly when asleep
5. Remembers why he's laughing
6. Is in good enough shape to stand up by himself
7. Usually wears some clothes
8. Doesn't notice my facial hair and wrinkles
9. Remembers where he left his teeth
10. Stops trying to tell jokes

What I want in a Man, Revised List (age 72)

1. Breathing.
2. Doesn't miss the toilet.
3. Remembers where we both live.=20


Cheers, Vince

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
Back to top
View user's profile AIM Address MSN Messenger Yahoo Messenger Photo Gallery
44marty
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Mar 20, 2009
Posts: 775
Location: Cheshire, MA; USA

PostPosted: Tue Sep 21, 2010 8:34 pm    Post subject: Re: What a woman wants Reply with quote

That's great!!! There's something to be said for older women, eh?

Now I can still remember where I live, but "you can't get there from here" may be just a few years away.

It's reassuring to know that I still have a chance at a 42 year old woman. I might have to move to Oz, though. I'm getting the feeling that the women are a bit fussier here in the US.

_________________
_____________________________________

The strength of the wolf is in the pack; the strength of the pack is in the wolf. ~ R. Kipling

I LOVE YOU, LADY LUCK !!!
Back to top
View user's profile Photo Gallery
bracer
Member
Member


Joined: Dec 24, 2009
Posts: 46
Location: Prairie Dog Country

PostPosted: Tue Sep 21, 2010 9:07 pm    Post subject: Re: What a woman wants Reply with quote

At age 75 I dont know if I care what they wont.

_________________
tuck2
Back to top
View user's profile
bracer
Member
Member


Joined: Dec 24, 2009
Posts: 46
Location: Prairie Dog Country

PostPosted: Tue Sep 21, 2010 9:08 pm    Post subject: Re: What a woman wants Reply with quote

At age 75 I dont know if I care what they wont.

_________________
tuck2
Back to top
View user's profile
Bushmaster
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jun 12, 2005
Posts: 11393
Location: Ava, Missouri

PostPosted: Wed Sep 22, 2010 8:30 am    Post subject: Re: What a woman wants Reply with quote

Yup Bracer I agree...And you posted this twice, if that helps any... Laughing

_________________
I have one nerve left and yer standin' on it...

DEMOCRACY Two wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for lunch...
LIBERTY A well armed sheep contesting the outcome of the vote...
Back to top
View user's profile
Suzanne
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jun 27, 2009
Posts: 3323
Location: Eugene, Oregon

PostPosted: Wed Sep 22, 2010 5:45 pm    Post subject: Re: What a woman wants Reply with quote

Bracer!!! you crack me UP!!!

Good one Vinnnnny!

_________________
May the moon keep you centered,
May the sun keep you dancing,
And the stars shed light on your dreams.
Back to top
View user's profile
Elvis
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jul 27, 2008
Posts: 9253
Location: south island New Zealand

PostPosted: Thu Sep 23, 2010 1:11 am    Post subject: Re: What a woman wants Reply with quote

yip older woman are a fine thing. at least I think they are Ive been married to a younger 1 for so long my memory is dimming.

_________________
You shot it You pluck it !
Them who eats the most duck eats the most feathers!
Back to top
View user's profile
slimjim
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: May 16, 2009
Posts: 8314
Location: Fort Worth TX

PostPosted: Thu Sep 23, 2010 3:47 am    Post subject: Re: What a woman wants Reply with quote

They say the key to always looking young is to hang out with people that are older than you. Thus, Elvis, you will always be the old man.

_________________
"To anger a conservative, lie to him. To anger a liberal, tell him the truth." - Theodore Roosevelt

"The world is a dangerous place to live; not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it." - Albert Einstein
Back to top
View user's profile Photo Gallery
stovepipe
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Sep 25, 2008
Posts: 4877
Location: Pine, Az.

PostPosted: Fri Sep 24, 2010 2:26 pm    Post subject: Re: What a woman wants Reply with quote

Wimmin's....pfft (Suz excluded of course). I'm a confirmed bachelor.

I LOVE'S ME GUNS AND DIRTBIKES. Very Happy
Back to top
View user's profile
slimjim
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: May 16, 2009
Posts: 8314
Location: Fort Worth TX

PostPosted: Fri Sep 24, 2010 5:07 pm    Post subject: Re: What a woman wants Reply with quote

stovepipe wrote:
I'm a confirmed bachelor.

So you are saying you never made any of the lists?
Back to top
View user's profile Photo Gallery
Elvis
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jul 27, 2008
Posts: 9253
Location: south island New Zealand

PostPosted: Fri Sep 24, 2010 10:13 pm    Post subject: Re: What a woman wants Reply with quote

Ive been out shooting today we got 5 bunnies 5 possoms and 2 hares it was hot and windy and I do feel like an old man thanks Slim.

_________________
You shot it You pluck it !
Them who eats the most duck eats the most feathers!
Back to top
View user's profile
slimjim
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: May 16, 2009
Posts: 8314
Location: Fort Worth TX

PostPosted: Sat Sep 25, 2010 5:31 am    Post subject: Re: What a woman wants Reply with quote

Elvis wrote:
5 bunnies 5 possoms and 2 hares

You have a great women!! If I walked into the house with that harvest, I wouldn't be on the most "wanted" list. The kitchen and dinner table would be all mine!

Are the possoms for pie?
Back to top
View user's profile Photo Gallery
Elvis
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jul 27, 2008
Posts: 9253
Location: south island New Zealand

PostPosted: Sat Sep 25, 2010 3:17 pm    Post subject: Re: What a woman wants Reply with quote

nah slim they are all for dog tucker to fatten our pampered pooches as the dog roll we feed them on doesnt do much for them and some decent meat they can put a foot on has to be a good change.

_________________
You shot it You pluck it !
Them who eats the most duck eats the most feathers!
Back to top
View user's profile
eunice.81
Rookie Member
Rookie Member


Joined: Oct 02, 2010
Posts: 4

PostPosted: Sat Oct 02, 2010 12:17 am    Post subject: Re: What a woman wants Reply with quote

This post is absolutely funny and also at some level quite true also, Vince. But after reading this post I can't able to stop my laugh up till now.

_________________
Orient Express Trips
Back to top
View user's profile
Display posts from previous:   
Post new topic   Reply to topic   Printer Friendly Page    Forum Index » Jokes & Humor
Page 1 of 1
All times are GMT - 7 Hours



Jump to:  


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum
You cannot attach files in this forum
You cannot download files in this forum


Valid CSS! Valid HTML 4.01!
Click to check if this page is realy HTML 4.01 compliant for speed :)

All logos and trademarks in this site are property of HuntingNut.com.
The comments are property of their posters, all the rest © 2011 by HuntingNut.com
Interactive software released under GNU GPL, Code Credits, Privacy Policy

.: Upgraded to DragonFly 9.2 by *Dizfunkshunal* :.