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Clemson University graduates
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
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lesterg3
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Joined: Nov 30, 2008
Posts: 1327
Location: Dixie

PostPosted: Tue Jan 20, 2009 5:18 am    Post subject: Clemson University graduates Reply with quote

A couple of my hunting buds and recent Clemson University graduates were out driving in Billy Bob’s camo colored ’68 Dodge Charger. Now understand that the camo coloring is not a paint job, but the original color was tan and there are two colors of bondo; gray and light green covering more than 50% of the body.

So, anyway as I was saying Billy Bob, and his uncle and brother-in-law Jimmy Lee were out driving round the country side sippin a few long necks and chasing squirrels off the road, when Billy Bob noticed that they were running low on gas, and even lower on beer so he says, “Jimmy Lee we need to head back to town to fill old Suzie Q up.”

“Hey”, says Jimmy Lee, “let’s go on down to that there new Kangaroo station, they’s got a sign up says free sex with fill-up.”

“Yea-ha, that sounds like a big ole winner to me”, and off they go.

A few minutes and several more beers later the boys pull into the newest station in town and Jimmy Lee’s Diddy (southern for father), who is also happens to be Billy Bob’s uncle, and father-in-law comes out to find out what the boy’s wanted. Unfortunately the boy’s family tree is shaped more like a wagon wheel.

“Fill her up Unc”, hollers Billy Bob.

“Yeah, Diddy and don’t ya’ll forget about that there free sex, now ya hear!”

So Diddy fills up the old Charger and walks up to Billy Bob ands says, “That’ll be $63.50 boys.”

So Billy Bob and Jimmy Lee scrounged through their pockets and found enough crumpled money to pay, and Diddy takes that money and starts to walk off when Jimmy Lee hollers, “Hey, what about our free sex?”

The old man turns back to the car and says, “OK boys, I reckon ya’ll filled her up so’s ya each get one chance at free sex. Billy Bob, guess a number between 1 and 10.”

Billy Bob hollers out, “Five”

Diddy says, “Nope, tha’s not right, Jimmy Lee what’s your guess?”

Jimmy Lees says, “Five”. The old man chuckles and says, “No, that’s still not right, but ya’ll come back and try again.”

So the boys start to drive off and Jimmy Lee turns to Billy Bob and says, “Now, I just don’t understand that, my wife was in here two times last week and won both times.”

_________________
"A democracy is nothing more than mob rule, where fifty-one percent of the people may take away the rights of the other forty-nine. "--Thomas Jefferson

The strongest reason for the people to retain the right to keep and bear arms is, as a last resort, to protect themselves against tyranny in government. -- Thomas Jefferson

"Americans have the right and advantage of being armed - unlike the citizens of other countries whose governments are afraid to trust the people with arms."--James Madison

"The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants." Thomas Jefferson.

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