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Is He Really Drunk?
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
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whittling
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Apr 21, 2008
Posts: 586
Location: Texas (home state is Mass)

PostPosted: Thu Apr 16, 2009 12:38 pm    Post subject: Is He Really Drunk? Reply with quote

Very Happy A man is in a bar and falling off his stool every couple of minutes. He is obviously drunk. So the bartender says to another man in the bar: "Why don't you be a good Samaritan and take him home."

The man takes the drunk out the door and to his car and he stumbles at least ten times. They drive along and the drunk points out his house to the man. He stops the car and the drunk stumbles up the steps to his house with the man.

The drunk's wife greets them at the door: "Why thank you for bringing him home for me, but where's his wheel chair?

And...

Yesterday, scientists in the United States revealed that beer contains small traces of female hormones.To prove their theory, they fed one hundred men twelve pints of beer and observed that 100% of them started talking nonsense and couldn't drive.

This might hurt !!

A man goes into a bar and seats himself on a stool. The bartender looks at him and says, "What'll it be buddy?"

The man says, "Set me up with seven whiskey shots and make them doubles." The bartender does this and watches the man slug one down, then the next, then the next, and so on until all seven are gone almost as quickly as they were served. Staring in disbelief, the bartender asks why he's doing all this drinking.

"You'd drink them this fast too if you had what I have."

The bartender hastily asks, "What do you have pal?"

The man quickly replies, "I have a dollar."

Now you know why I don't drink [other than my age ]!!

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Molon labe!
Service, honor and courage, without these a warrior is nothing.
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Vince
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Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 13071
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 1:12 am    Post subject: Re: Is He Really Drunk? Reply with quote

I like the last one especially Whittles...good post mate.

Cheers, Vince

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Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
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