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Food that causes you to suffer
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
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gelandangan
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Location: Sydney Australia

PostPosted: Mon Jul 01, 2013 6:24 pm    Post subject: Food that causes you to suffer Reply with quote

A doctor was addressing a large audience in Oxford ...

"The material we put into our stomachs should have killed most of us sitting here, years ago. Red meat is full of steroids and dye. Soft drinks corrode your stomach lining. Chinese food is loaded with MSG. High transfat diets can be disastrous and none of us realizes the long-term harm caused by the germs in our drinking water. But, there is one thing that is the most dangerous of all and most of us have, or will eat it. Can anyone here tell me what food it is that causes the most grief and suffering for years after eating it?"

After several seconds of quiet, a 70-year-old man in the front row raised his hand, and softly said, "Wedding Cake."

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Elvis
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PostPosted: Mon Jul 01, 2013 11:10 pm    Post subject: Re: Food that causes you to suffer Reply with quote

it has an amazing capacity to reduce the female " Embarassed drive Embarassed " too!!!!

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slimjim
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PostPosted: Tue Jul 02, 2013 2:09 am    Post subject: Re: Food that causes you to suffer Reply with quote

Thanks for my morning chuckle, gelandangan. I didn't see that coming.

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Bushmaster
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PostPosted: Tue Jul 02, 2013 7:47 am    Post subject: Re: Food that causes you to suffer Reply with quote

Yup...It makes perfect sense. Being 70 I understand.

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radar
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PostPosted: Wed Jul 03, 2013 4:45 pm    Post subject: Re: Food that causes you to suffer Reply with quote

Priceless, shows that no matter how old you are your opinion matters, always listen to the elders, years of experience and learning there.
Shame more of our younger generations don't.

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Elvis
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PostPosted: Thu Jul 04, 2013 2:50 am    Post subject: Re: Food that causes you to suffer Reply with quote

on a sadder note Sad
I have just got over a case of gout that had me hobbling around for 3 weeks Sad
the booklet about it the Doctor gave me says less beer, duck and venison Sad Sad I feel like my throat has been cut Sad oh well only 2-3 times a week from now on I guess Very Happy

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Ominivision1
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PostPosted: Thu Jul 04, 2013 3:55 am    Post subject: Re: Food that causes you to suffer Reply with quote

Dam Elvis, that suxs, the booklet your MD gave you says less venison & duck?? Over here they say lay off turkey and beer!

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Elvis
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PostPosted: Thu Jul 04, 2013 8:48 pm    Post subject: Re: Food that causes you to suffer Reply with quote

them too!!!

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gelandangan
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Joined: May 07, 2006
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Location: Sydney Australia

PostPosted: Thu Jul 04, 2013 10:19 pm    Post subject: Re: Food that causes you to suffer Reply with quote

Elvis mate, no joke, I got gout attack a few years ago.
Best way to get well is to drink plenty of water (choke on them if you have to) and urinate out all the uric acid in your body.
I remember to drink over 4 liters a day for a couple of days..
Gone to toilet every hour or so, and drink some more..
But the attack gone after the second day of forced drinking.

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A straight line is the shortest distance between two points.
A smile is the shortest distance between two people.

The government I trust .. is my .45-70 Government.

Do - Not try!


gelandangan.weebly.com/
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Elvis
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PostPosted: Thu Jul 04, 2013 10:24 pm    Post subject: Re: Food that causes you to suffer Reply with quote

thanks mate will up the water from the 2ltrs+ I drink now.

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pete4d
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Joined: Nov 27, 2011
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Location: Dixie , Alabama , & Louisiana

PostPosted: Fri Jul 05, 2013 6:18 am    Post subject: Re: Food that causes you to suffer Reply with quote

Benadryl Gel and the bing cherries sure helps for a good nights sleep. Hell to sleep with the toes under the covers Mad
But I still get to drink my beer , just not everyday Cheers

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Elvis
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PostPosted: Sat Jul 06, 2013 1:53 am    Post subject: Re: Food that causes you to suffer Reply with quote

killed one of our sheep today, if we have to cut back on the venison and duck I will just have to eat mutton...just as well we love the ol range maggot!!!
.223 just behind the ear did a wonderful job of rounding up the old weather for me...who needs a sheep dog lol.

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