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Two line poetry
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
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Vince
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 14142
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Sat Jan 04, 2014 6:37 am    Post subject: Two line poetry Reply with quote

Parental Advisory

THESE ARE ENTRIES TO A WASHINGTON POST COMPETITION ASKING FOR A TWO-LINE RHYME
WITH THE MOST ROMANTIC FIRST LINE,
AND THE LEAST ROMANTIC SECOND LINE:


1. My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife:
Marrying you has screwed up my life. Confused

2. I see your face when I am dreaming.
That's why I always wake up screaming. scared

3. Kind, intelligent, loving and hot;
This describes everything you are not. Blah

4. Love may be beautiful, love may be bliss,
But I only went with you 'cause I was p1ssed. Wink

5. I thought that I could love no other
-- that is until I met your brother. Embarassed Yuck

6. Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you.
But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead, the sugar bowl's empty and so is your head. Bonk

7. I want to feel your sweet embrace;
But don't take that paper bag off your face. Viking

8. I love your smile, your face, and your eyes
Damn, I'm good at telling lies! Argue

9. My love, you take my breath away.
What have you stepped in to smell this way? Yuck

10. My feelings for you no words can tell,
Except for maybe 'Go to hell.' Evil Devil

11. What inspired this amorous rhyme?
Two parts vodka, one part lime. Cheers

WHO SAID POETRY IS BORING?

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
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gelandangan
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: May 07, 2006
Posts: 6019
Location: Sydney Australia

PostPosted: Sat Jan 04, 2014 2:47 pm    Post subject: Re: Two line poetry Reply with quote

Awww Vince romantic becomes you. Very Happy

_________________
A straight line is the shortest distance between two points.
A smile is the shortest distance between two people.

The government I trust .. is my .45-70 Government.

Do - Not try!


gelandangan.weebly.com/
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Elvis
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jul 27, 2008
Posts: 7991
Location: south island New Zealand

PostPosted: Sat Jan 04, 2014 7:51 pm    Post subject: Re: Two line poetry Reply with quote

classic Mate...classic.

_________________
You shot it You pluck it !
Them who eats the most duck eats the most feathers!
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pete4d
Super Member
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Joined: Nov 27, 2011
Posts: 693
Location: Dixie , Alabama , & Louisiana

PostPosted: Sun Jan 05, 2014 7:04 am    Post subject: Re: Two line poetry Reply with quote

I can relate to some of those. Cheers Evil or Very Mad Cheers

_________________
"march to the sound of the guns and shoot everyone not dressed like you"--D I 1968

When the SHTF I'm gonna hunker down until all those idiots kill each other.

I'm on the watch list are you ?
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dhc4ever
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: May 26, 2011
Posts: 2526
Location: Ipswich, Queensland Australia

PostPosted: Sun Jan 05, 2014 1:50 pm    Post subject: Re: Two line poetry Reply with quote

So how did the poetry reading for your wife go?

Got back into the airconditioning yet?

_________________
Pete

Dont do anything you wont like explaining to the paramedics..............
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Vince
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 14142
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Sun Jan 05, 2014 9:45 pm    Post subject: Re: Two line poetry Reply with quote

No poetry for my SWMBO...not game mate. scared

Air Con...oh, I wish. Spent last Saturday at the shopping Centre...sat in the back of the Food Court and read a book. Today isn't much better, but I have things I have to do at home. It's been 35*C (95*F) inside and when I took the thermometer outside, into my shaded pergola, the temp went up to 46*C (115*F) in the shade. I'd hate to be out your way mate...it is even hotter.

Fortunately we have a thunder storm headed this way, so I am hoping within an hour or so things will be significantly cooler. Might even sit out in the rain in a pair of shorts with a nice cold beer. Very Happy Very Happy Laughing Laughing Cheers

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
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Elvis
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jul 27, 2008
Posts: 7991
Location: south island New Zealand

PostPosted: Sun Jan 05, 2014 10:26 pm    Post subject: Re: Two line poetry Reply with quote

yip that is an awesome idea mate. did that last year under the lawn sprinkler. kids looked at me like I was cookoo.

_________________
You shot it You pluck it !
Them who eats the most duck eats the most feathers!
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gelandangan
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: May 07, 2006
Posts: 6019
Location: Sydney Australia

PostPosted: Sun Jan 05, 2014 10:59 pm    Post subject: Re: Two line poetry Reply with quote

Yesterday it was a bit hot in Sydney, but today we have a balmy 25 C .. and the forecast would be below 25 for the rest of the week too..
Yeah!!

_________________
A straight line is the shortest distance between two points.
A smile is the shortest distance between two people.

The government I trust .. is my .45-70 Government.

Do - Not try!


gelandangan.weebly.com/
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Vince
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 14142
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Sun Jan 05, 2014 11:22 pm    Post subject: Re: Two line poetry Reply with quote

Cooled down nicely outside now.. I got out into the rain, but no beer...had a ball chasing my 2 yr old granddaughter around...she loved the rain.

Beer will come later.

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
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radar
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Oct 01, 2008
Posts: 1108
Location: North Island New Zealand

PostPosted: Sun Jan 05, 2014 11:50 pm    Post subject: Re: Two line poetry Reply with quote

Nat read them and loved the poetry Vince but she does suggest you try your hand at something else…...

_________________
People sleep peaceably in their beds at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf.

George Orwell
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