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My New alphabet
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
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Vince
Super Member
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Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 14155
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Sat Jul 03, 2010 5:09 am    Post subject: My New alphabet Reply with quote

Haven't heard mention of CRS for quite sometime, we must have all forgotten about it...so I thought I'd throw this one in just to remind us all of what we can expect in later life.


Alphabet: A is for apple, and B is for boat, That used to be right, but now it won't float! Age before beauty is what we once said, But let's be a bit more realistic instead.

Now The OAP’s Alphabet:

A's for arthritis;
B's the bad back,
C's the chest pains, perhaps car-d-iac?
D is for dental decay and decline,
E is for eyesight, can't read that top line!
F is for fissures and fluid retention,
G is for gas which I'd rather not mention.
H high blood pressure--I'd rather it low;
I for incisions with scars you can show.
J is for joints, out of socket, won't mend,
K is for knees that crack when they bend.
L 's for libido, what happened to sex?
M is for memory, I forget what comes next.
N is neuralgia, in nerves way down low;
O is for osteo, bones that don't grow!
P for prescriptions, I have quite a few, just give me a pill and I'll be good as new!
Q is for queasy, is it fatal or flu?
R is for reflux, one meal turns to two.
S is for sleepless nights, counting my fears,
T is for Tinnitus; bells in my ears!
U is for urinary; troubles with flow;
V for vertigo, that's 'dizzy,' you know.
W for worry, now what's going 'round?
X is for X ray, and what might be found.
Y for another year I'm left here behind,
Z is for zest I still have-- in my mind!

I've survived all the symptoms, my body's deployed, and I'm keeping twenty-six doctors fully employed.

HAVE A GREAT DAY!


Cheers, Vince

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
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OBOne
Member
Member


Joined: May 24, 2008
Posts: 32
Location: Near Pensacola, Fl.

PostPosted: Sat Jul 03, 2010 5:24 am    Post subject: Re: My New alphabet Reply with quote

WOW Vince, you got em all right. Step to the head of line. The line at the old folks home of course.
OB
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OBOne
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Joined: May 24, 2008
Posts: 32
Location: Near Pensacola, Fl.

PostPosted: Sat Jul 03, 2010 5:24 am    Post subject: Re: My New alphabet Reply with quote

WOW Vince, you got em all right. Step to the head of line. The line at the old folks home of course.
OB
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Vince
Super Member
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Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 14155
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Sat Jul 03, 2010 5:28 am    Post subject: Re: My New alphabet Reply with quote

Thanks Obone....but to be fair...I learned them all from experience I think. Laughing

Cheers, Vince

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
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