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Scottish Pearls of Wisdom
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
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Vince
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Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 13571
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Mon Jun 20, 2011 1:06 am    Post subject: Scottish Pearls of Wisdom Reply with quote

5 pearls of Scottish wisdom to remember:

1. Money cannot buy happiness, but somehow it's more comfortable to cry in a Mercedes Benz than it is on a bicycle.

2. Forgive your enemy but remember the bastard's name.

3. Help a man when he is in trouble, and he will remember you when he is in trouble again.

4. Many people are alive only because it's illegal to shoot them.

5. Alcohol does not solve any problem, but then neither does milk.

Cheers, Vince

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
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Elvis
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Joined: Jul 27, 2008
Posts: 7481
Location: south island New Zealand

PostPosted: Mon Jun 20, 2011 1:30 am    Post subject: Re: Scottish Pearls of Wisdom Reply with quote

#1 also applies to making love
#2 very true and great advice
#3 learn to hide and get caller ID
#4 that is soo true. buy a shovel and learn to hide the evidence.
# not true alcohol solves the problem of ugly people. without it sex would not happen

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Them who eats the most duck eats the most feathers!
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Vince
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Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 13571
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Mon Jun 20, 2011 5:59 am    Post subject: Re: Scottish Pearls of Wisdom Reply with quote

Elvis wrote:
...# not true alcohol solves the problem of ugly people. without it sex would not happen...

Here ya go mate...something to better help you understand the correlation between alcohol and ugly peoples.

Beer Goggles
Cheers, Vince

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
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