Just read it on another forum, though you guys might appreciate it..


Men Are Just Happier People --
What do you expect from such simple creatures?
Your last name stays put.
The garage is all yours.
Wedding plans take care of themselves.
Chocolate is just another snack...
You can be President.
You can never be pregnant.
You can wear a white T-shirt to a waterpark.
You can wear NO shirt to a water park.
Car mechanics tell you the truth.
The world is your urinal.
You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky.
You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
Same work, more pay.
Wrinkles add character.
People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
New shoes don't cut, blister or mangle your feet.
One mood all the time.
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
You know stuff about tanks.
A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
You can open all your own jars.
You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
If someone forgets to invite you, He or she can still be your friend.
Your underwear is $10 for a three-pack.
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough..
You almost never have strap problems in public.
You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes..
Everything on your face stays its original color.
The same hairstyle lasts for years, even decades.
You only have to shave your face and neck.
You can play with toys all your life.
One wallet and one pair of shoes -- one color for all seasons
You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
You can 'do' your nails with a pocket knife.
You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.
You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives On December 24 in 25 minutes

EATING OUT
When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John
will each throw in £20, even though it's only for £42.50. None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back.
When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.

MONEY
A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.
A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need but it's on sale.

BATHROOMS
A man has six items in his bathroom:
toothbrush and toothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap and a towel.
The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337.
A man would not be able to identify more than 20 of these items.

ARGUMENTS
A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

FUTURE
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

Ain't that the truth Radar.

very good GELAN...

I'll admit I like that one tremendously, I smiled all the way through it, can you get me a beer sweetie?

"can you get me a beer sweetie?"

That's my line....

Vince wrote:

Ain't that the truth Radar.

I think you need a few more brews and you'll get it right.

Good one Geland

NICE!

Again I won't show it to HRH.

Is that Her Royal Highnes?
I didn't know the Aussis still had one...

Aloysius wrote:

Is that Her Royal Highnes? I didn't know the Aussis still had one...

MMMM, close but no cigar.
Radar is from UNZUD (New Zealand) and by mutual agreement definately NOT an Aussie.
Yet. wait until the South Pacific version of the Eurozone gets a lift off.
The first act of that Parliament will be to absorb the All Blacks into the Wallabies rugby team, all other problems are secondary to that.........

As to the Queen, Yep both Australia and new Zealand are still borrowing the English queen and the Westminster system of Government.
Why not become a "republic"? basically because we don't trust our politicians to stuff around with the current constitution to the peoples advantage, nor will they give us a bill of rights that actually cant be stuffed around with.
This WILL all come to a head when Queen Elizabeth dies sometime in the next 15 to 20 years, that will be an interesting time.

And as to his HRH comment, he meant SWMBO