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lesterg3 Super Member
Joined: Nov 30, 2008 Posts: 1328 Location: Dixie
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Posted: Sat Feb 10, 2018 5:53 am Post subject: Learning to cuss |
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A 6 year old and a 4 year old are raking the yard.
The 6 year old asks, "You know what? I think it's about time we started learning to cuss".
The 4 year old nods his head in approval.
The 6 year old continues, "When we go in for breakfast, I'm gonna say something with hell and you say something with ass".
The 4 year old agrees with enthusiasm.
When the mother walks into the kitchen and asks the 6 year old what he wants for breakfast, he replies,
"Aw, hell, Mom, I guess I'll have some Cheerios".
WHACK!
He flies out of his chair, tumbles across the kitchen floor, gets up, and runs upstairs crying his eyes out, with his mother in hot pursuit, slapping his rear with every step. His mom locks him in his room and shouts, "You can stay there until I let you out!"
She then comes back downstairs, looks at the 4 year old and asks with a stern voice, "And what do YOU want for breakfast, young man?"
"I don't know", he blubbers, "but you can bet your ass it won't be Cheerios"..
_________________ "A democracy is nothing more than mob rule, where fifty-one percent of the people may take away the rights of the other forty-nine. "--Thomas Jefferson
The strongest reason for the people to retain the right to keep and bear arms is, as a last resort, to protect themselves against tyranny in government. -- Thomas Jefferson
"Americans have the right and advantage of being armed - unlike the citizens of other countries whose governments are afraid to trust the people with arms."--James Madison
"The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants." Thomas Jefferson.
NRA Life Member
Vietnam War Vet 68-69 |
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Bushmaster Super Member
Joined: Jun 12, 2005 Posts: 11390 Location: Ava, Missouri
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Posted: Sat Feb 10, 2018 10:52 am Post subject: Re: Learning to cuss |
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Thanks Lester...
_________________ I have one nerve left and yer standin' on it...
DEMOCRACY Two wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for lunch...
LIBERTY A well armed sheep contesting the outcome of the vote... |
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PaulS Super Member
Joined: Feb 18, 2006 Posts: 4330 Location: South-Eastern Washington - the State
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Posted: Sat Feb 10, 2018 5:11 pm Post subject: Re: Learning to cuss |
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... and that's when the violence began ...
I was sheltered from all that growing up. My parents never swore or even had loud discussions. I suppose that's why when my dad said, "get off your butt and get downstairs and clean the basement." it made a real impression on me. Dad believed in corporal punishment and used a belt on me a LOT (I deserved it most of the time) but when he used the word "butt" it was as close to swearing as I had heard from him.
I rarely swear and my present wife and I never fight or argue about anything. We have discussions occasionally and it usually starts out with her saying, "I need to talk with my husband, not the counselor." I have a habit of going into that counselor mode too often I suppose - you know "active listening" and repeating what I understood in different words. So I know when she just needs to vent or hear me say I will work on that, then we hug and go on from there. She is a good woman with very few bad habits and she puts up will all my bad habits and still loves me.
My first wife was a joke! Addicts have no sense of humor or any sense of anything other than the need for their next fix. The joke was on me because it took me 10 years to figure out that she was an addict. My best friend knew it long before I did. The joke was over after the last three years of hell when the divorce was final.
_________________ Paul
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English Mike Super Member
Joined: Jan 08, 2007 Posts: 1709 Location: Whitehaven, Cumbria, UK
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Posted: Sat Feb 10, 2018 5:49 pm Post subject: Re: Learning to cuss |
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90% of the time I don't swear but put me behind the wheel of my truck & I swear like a trooper at all the ars**oles who infest the UK's roads these days...
..the dithering, dangerous, incompetent wan**rs.
PS: I held back, this being a family friendly place...
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Elvis Super Member
Joined: Jul 27, 2008 Posts: 9239 Location: south island New Zealand
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Posted: Sat Feb 10, 2018 10:16 pm Post subject: Re: Learning to cuss |
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yip Mike I hear you on that one...trying really hard to clean up my potty mouth but these incompetant dipsticks would try the patience of saint.....
my current method to tone it down when it gets too much is to bless them and wish them a nice day after cussing them good and proper....work in progress you could say.
_________________ You shot it You pluck it !
Them who eats the most duck eats the most feathers! |
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Bushmaster Super Member
Joined: Jun 12, 2005 Posts: 11390 Location: Ava, Missouri
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Posted: Sat Feb 10, 2018 11:23 pm Post subject: Re: Learning to cuss |
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I'm retired Navy... You think I might have a bit of a "flowery" (read "salty") speech?
_________________ I have one nerve left and yer standin' on it...
DEMOCRACY Two wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for lunch...
LIBERTY A well armed sheep contesting the outcome of the vote... |
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dhc4ever Super Member
Joined: May 26, 2011 Posts: 2944 Location: Ipswich, Queensland Australia
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Posted: Sun Feb 11, 2018 2:14 am Post subject: Re: Learning to cuss |
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Ex military and I now drive for a living.....
English is a very expressive language.
Brisbane drivers, gott in himmel!
_________________ Pete
Dont do anything you wont like explaining to the paramedics.............. |
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TRBLSHTR Super Member
Joined: Mar 23, 2007 Posts: 1071 Location: Lower 48's-left coast(near portlandia)
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