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treadmill
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
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Tremblay
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Joined: Oct 08, 2007
Posts: 1941
Location: Malta, Montana

PostPosted: Tue Feb 12, 2019 11:37 pm    Post subject: treadmill Reply with quote

gas

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Patriotism is supporting your country all the time, and your government when it deserves it. - Mark
Twain

Never argue with a stupid person ,cause they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience. Mark Twwain
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Elvis
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Joined: Jul 27, 2008
Posts: 7841
Location: south island New Zealand

PostPosted: Wed Feb 13, 2019 2:34 am    Post subject: Re: treadmill Reply with quote

its pretty hard to avoid one if you are wearing overalls/boiler suit too...I have learnt if you put your arm out window and let air blow up your sleave it does help remove it quickly however.

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You shot it You pluck it !
Them who eats the most duck eats the most feathers!
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slimjim
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Joined: May 16, 2009
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PostPosted: Wed Feb 13, 2019 5:43 pm    Post subject: Re: treadmill Reply with quote

oooow .. that brings back memories ....

I was once on an airplane in the middle seat trying to sleep. I was able to silently relieve some pressure. It was very difficult to keep from twitching my nose as the aroma permeated the cabin. I had all I could do not to laugh when the intoxicated guy behind me roared, "boy, is that a good one! Wow! its just not going away!" I figured the golden rule applied - he who smelt it dealt it.

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"The world is a dangerous place to live; not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it." - Albert Einstein
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slimjim
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PostPosted: Wed Feb 13, 2019 5:47 pm    Post subject: Re: treadmill Reply with quote

oh, oh! Then the time I was riding a crowded elevator with a buddy. He quickly fit a button for the next floor and said follow me. As the doors closed, we turned and watched as everyone's nose wrinkled up! We were laughing pretty hard. We took the stairs the rest of the way.

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"The world is a dangerous place to live; not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it." - Albert Einstein
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slimjim
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PostPosted: Wed Feb 13, 2019 5:51 pm    Post subject: Re: treadmill Reply with quote

OH, OH! I was in a three man room in college. After lights out, my buddy who was the stroke on the rowing team (big guy) would hold it. Then one of us would let one rip, the other would answer, and we would toot back and forth until the last man won. The 3rd roommate would walk out in discussed.

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"To anger a conservative, lie to him. To anger a liberal, tell him the truth." - Theodore Roosevelt

"The world is a dangerous place to live; not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it." - Albert Einstein
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slimjim
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PostPosted: Wed Feb 13, 2019 5:52 pm    Post subject: Re: treadmill Reply with quote

Oooops. My reputation is ruined, isn't it?

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"To anger a conservative, lie to him. To anger a liberal, tell him the truth." - Theodore Roosevelt

"The world is a dangerous place to live; not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it." - Albert Einstein
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Vince
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Joined: May 25, 2005
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Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Wed Feb 13, 2019 6:37 pm    Post subject: Re: treadmill Reply with quote

slimjim wrote:
Oooops. My reputation is ruined, isn't it?

Ruined, not at all mate...you have almost achieved hero status.

The elevator one brings back memories. I remember one time one of those SBD ones snuck out when in an elevator. Nowhere to hide, so I applied the old rule/trick of slowly and carefully turn and look at the person beside you and then ignore the rancid stink. It actually works. Laughing Laughing

Another nasty (but funny at the same time) one is to drop a couple on a travelator/moving walkway and carefully watch the “ambush” happen.

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Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
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slimjim
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PostPosted: Wed Feb 13, 2019 9:17 pm    Post subject: Re: treadmill Reply with quote

Vince wrote:
Another nasty (but funny at the same time) one is to drop a couple on a travelator/moving walkway and carefully watch the “ambush” happen.

LOL!!!

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"To anger a conservative, lie to him. To anger a liberal, tell him the truth." - Theodore Roosevelt

"The world is a dangerous place to live; not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it." - Albert Einstein
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tikkat3
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PostPosted: Thu Feb 14, 2019 12:00 am    Post subject: Re: treadmill Reply with quote

Or turn to the wife and say "Oh Ann"
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RePete
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PostPosted: Thu Feb 14, 2019 4:24 am    Post subject: Re: treadmill Reply with quote

Or, ask what was the question?

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Stercus Accidit = Sh*t Happens in Latin.

Nice try = You Suck spelled different.
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Vince
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PostPosted: Thu Feb 14, 2019 4:50 am    Post subject: Re: treadmill Reply with quote

This works...

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Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
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slimjim
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Location: Fort Worth TX

PostPosted: Thu Feb 14, 2019 5:31 am    Post subject: Re: treadmill Reply with quote

or this one ... I was riding with a friend back to college one cold winter day having a nice conversation. He suddenly stopped in mid-sentence and powered all the windows down. Then he turned back to me and said "you are about to thank me".

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"To anger a conservative, lie to him. To anger a liberal, tell him the truth." - Theodore Roosevelt

"The world is a dangerous place to live; not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it." - Albert Einstein
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slimjim
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PostPosted: Thu Feb 14, 2019 5:31 am    Post subject: Re: treadmill Reply with quote

We were in a Datzun 240Z

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"To anger a conservative, lie to him. To anger a liberal, tell him the truth." - Theodore Roosevelt

"The world is a dangerous place to live; not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it." - Albert Einstein
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Vince
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PostPosted: Thu Feb 14, 2019 8:42 pm    Post subject: Re: treadmill Reply with quote

Scratch Scratch DOH Shocked Laughing

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Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
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dhc4ever
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Joined: May 26, 2011
Posts: 2459
Location: Ipswich, Queensland Australia

PostPosted: Fri Feb 15, 2019 3:45 am    Post subject: Re: treadmill Reply with quote

240z's had powered windows?.

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Pete

Dont do anything you wont like explaining to the paramedics..............
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