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Ray the chicken
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
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Elvis
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jul 27, 2008
Posts: 7579
Location: south island New Zealand

PostPosted: Thu Oct 04, 2018 10:03 am    Post subject: Ray the chicken Reply with quote

Ray the Chicken
Ray came home one night from a long day at work, slid into bed beside his sleeping wife, and fell into a deep slumber.
He awoke before the Pearly Gates, where St. Peter said, 'You died in your sleep, Ray.'

Ray was stunned. 'I'm dead? No, I can't be! I've got too much to live for. Send me back!'

St. Peter said, 'I'm sorry, but there's only one way you can go back, and that is as a chicken.'

Ray was devastated, but begged St. Peter to send him to a farm near his home. The next thing he knew, he was covered with feathers, clucking and pecking the ground.

A rooster strolled past. 'So, you're the new hen, huh? How's your first day here?'

'Not bad,' replied Ray the hen, 'but I have this strange feeling inside. Like I'm gonna explode!'

'You're ovulating,' explained the rooster. 'Don't tell me you've never laid an egg before?'

'Never,' said Ray.

'Well, just relax and let it happen,' says the rooster. 'It's no big deal. He did, and a few uncomfortable seconds later, out popped an egg! He was overcome with emotion as he experienced motherhood. He soon laid another egg - his joy was overwhelming.

As he was about to lay his third egg, he felt a smack on the back of his head, and heard.....

"Ray, wake up! You pooped the bed!"

_________________
You shot it You pluck it !
Them who eats the most duck eats the most feathers!
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Tremblay
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Oct 08, 2007
Posts: 1844
Location: Malta, Montana

PostPosted: Thu Oct 04, 2018 2:05 pm    Post subject: Re: Ray the chicken Reply with quote

ROFL ROFL ROFL ROFL ROFL Laughing

_________________
Patriotism is supporting your country all the time, and your government when it deserves it. - Mark
Twain

Never argue with a stupid person ,cause they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience. Mark Twwain
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Vince
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 13660
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Fri Oct 05, 2018 11:30 pm    Post subject: Re: Ray the chicken Reply with quote

Haha Haha Haha Haha

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
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