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radar Super Member
Joined: Oct 01, 2008 Posts: 1109 Location: North Island New Zealand
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Posted: Thu Sep 02, 2010 7:50 pm Post subject: For all the gringos - The Bacon Tree |
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The Bacon tree
Two Mexicans are stuck in the desert after crossing into the United States , wandering aimlessly and starving. They are about to just lie down and wait for death, when all of a sudden Luis says..........
"Hey Pepe, do you smell what I smell. Ees bacon, I theenk."
"Is, Luis, eet sure smells like bacon.. "
With renewed hope they struggle up the next sand dune, & there, in the distance, is a tree loaded with bacon.
There's raw bacon, there's fried bacon, back bacon, double smoked bacon ........ every imaginable kind of cured pork.
"Pepe, Pepe, we ees saved. Ees a bacon tree."
"Luis, maybe ees a meerage? We ees in the desert don't forget."
"Pepe, since when deed you ever hear of a meerage that smell like bacon...ees no meerage, ees a bacon tree."
And with that, Luis staggers towards the tree. He gets to within 5 metres, Pepe crawling close behind, when suddenly a machine gun opens up, and Luis drops like a wet sock. Mortally wounded, he warns Pepe with his dying breath,
"Pepe... go back man, you was right, ees not a bacon tree!"
"Luis, Luis MI amigo... what ees it? "
"Pepe.. ees not a bacon tree. Ees
Ees
Ees
Ees
Ees a ham bush...."
SO SORRY, I know there is something wrong with me for sending you this. Just couldn't help it!
The little voices made me do it !!! And I bet you tried to do the accent didn't you - I know you did!
_________________ People sleep peaceably in their beds at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf.
George Orwell |
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Suzanne Super Member
Joined: Jun 27, 2009 Posts: 3323 Location: Eugene, Oregon
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Posted: Thu Sep 02, 2010 8:45 pm Post subject: Re: For all the gringos - The Bacon Tree |
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Radar You are my HERO!!
My sister and I told that one to my family at Christmas one year.
We were the only ones that thought it was hilarious.
Yeah it was a bust.
We stood there with half-grins, waiting for the laughter.
They all looked at us like were insane, and wanted to hear the rest of the story.
It must be more fun to tell it, than it is to hear it.
I love it, screw them that don't....so there
Suz
_________________ May the moon keep you centered,
May the sun keep you dancing,
And the stars shed light on your dreams. |
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radar Super Member
Joined: Oct 01, 2008 Posts: 1109 Location: North Island New Zealand
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Posted: Thu Sep 02, 2010 8:55 pm Post subject: Re: For all the gringos - The Bacon Tree |
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Hey I'm glad I made at least one persons day today!
I'm working lateshift tonight fighting drunks, wife beaters and gang members so I'm sure I'll ruin a lot of peoples nights here. Take care.
_________________ People sleep peaceably in their beds at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf.
George Orwell |
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slimjim Super Member
Joined: May 16, 2009 Posts: 8314 Location: Fort Worth TX
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Posted: Fri Sep 03, 2010 6:55 am Post subject: Re: For all the gringos - The Bacon Tree |
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Thanks radar, well done! It was worth more than a few chuckles!
_________________ "To anger a conservative, lie to him. To anger a liberal, tell him the truth." - Theodore Roosevelt
"The world is a dangerous place to live; not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it." - Albert Einstein |
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Weinbender Member
Joined: Sep 13, 2007 Posts: 226 Location: Manitoba, Canada
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Posted: Fri Sep 03, 2010 10:19 am Post subject: Re: For all the gringos - The Bacon Tree |
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_________________ "If it dont kick like a mule, it aint worth shooting" |
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Elvis Super Member
Joined: Jul 27, 2008 Posts: 9253 Location: south island New Zealand
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Posted: Fri Sep 03, 2010 10:57 am Post subject: Re: For all the gringos - The Bacon Tree |
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well done Radar a good chuckle to calm the nerves. weve been woken this morning by an earthquake at 4.40 are still getting aftershocks at5.45 so are a we tad jumpy. Keep up the good fight on that thin blue line.
_________________ You shot it You pluck it !
Them who eats the most duck eats the most feathers! |
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radar Super Member
Joined: Oct 01, 2008 Posts: 1109 Location: North Island New Zealand
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Posted: Fri Sep 03, 2010 1:35 pm Post subject: Re: For all the gringos - The Bacon Tree |
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Elvis, You and your family OK? After that how can I complain about quakes. That was a real quake no doubt about it. Keep your feet on the ground.
_________________ People sleep peaceably in their beds at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf.
George Orwell |
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slimjim Super Member
Joined: May 16, 2009 Posts: 8314 Location: Fort Worth TX
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Posted: Fri Sep 03, 2010 1:47 pm Post subject: Re: For all the gringos - The Bacon Tree |
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shaken not stirred! Glad you are doing ok.
_________________ "To anger a conservative, lie to him. To anger a liberal, tell him the truth." - Theodore Roosevelt
"The world is a dangerous place to live; not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it." - Albert Einstein |
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Elvis Super Member
Joined: Jul 27, 2008 Posts: 9253 Location: south island New Zealand
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Posted: Fri Sep 03, 2010 7:08 pm Post subject: Re: For all the gringos - The Bacon Tree |
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Yip Radar thanks for the concern we are fine.
_________________ You shot it You pluck it !
Them who eats the most duck eats the most feathers! |
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Elvis Super Member
Joined: Jul 27, 2008 Posts: 9253 Location: south island New Zealand
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Posted: Fri Sep 03, 2010 7:08 pm Post subject: Re: For all the gringos - The Bacon Tree |
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Yip Radar thanks for the concern we are fine.
_________________ You shot it You pluck it !
Them who eats the most duck eats the most feathers! |
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