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the three bears
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
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Elvis
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jul 27, 2008
Posts: 9266
Location: south island New Zealand

PostPosted: Mon May 01, 2017 2:44 am    Post subject: the three bears Reply with quote

*A far more accurate account of the events of that fateful morning....*



*Baby bear goes downstairs, sits in his small chair at the table. He looks
into his small bowl. It is empty. 'Who's been eating my porridge?' he
squeaks.*

*Daddy Bear arrives at the big table and sits in his big chair. He looks
into his big bowl and it is also empty. 'Who's been eating my porridge?!?'
he roars.*


*Mummy Bear puts her head through the serving hatch from the kitchen and
yells, 'For God's sake, how many times do I have to go through this with
you idiots? *

*It was Mummy Bear who got up first. *

*It was Mummy Bear who woke everyone in the house. *

*It was Mummy Bear who made the coffee.*

*It was Mummy Bear who unloaded the dishwasher from last night and put
everything away. *

*It was Mummy Bear who swept the floor in the kitchen. *

*It was Mummy Bear who went out in the cold early morning air to fetch the
newspaper and croissants. *
*It was Mummy Bear who set the damn table.*
*It was Mummy Bear who walked the bloody dog, cleaned the cat's litter
tray, gave them their food, and refilled their water.*
*And now that you've decided to drag your sorry bear-arses downstairs and
grace Mummy Bear with your grumpy presence, listen carefully, because I'm
only going to say this once....*



*I HAVEN'T MADE THE F***ING PORRIDGE YET '*

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gelandangan
Super Member
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Joined: May 07, 2006
Posts: 6403
Location: Sydney Australia

PostPosted: Mon May 01, 2017 4:11 am    Post subject: Re: the three bears Reply with quote

Very Happy

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Bushmaster
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jun 12, 2005
Posts: 11395
Location: Ava, Missouri

PostPosted: Mon May 01, 2017 8:31 am    Post subject: Re: the three bears Reply with quote

Always love a "happy" ending. I'm going back to bed.

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DEMOCRACY Two wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for lunch...
LIBERTY A well armed sheep contesting the outcome of the vote...
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Tremblay
Super Member
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Joined: Oct 08, 2007
Posts: 2656
Location: Malta, Montana

PostPosted: Sun May 07, 2017 12:22 pm    Post subject: Re: the three bears Reply with quote

Embarassed Laughing ROFL

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