HuntingNut
HuntingNut
   Login or Register
HomeCommunity ForumsPhoto AlbumsRegister
     
 

User Info

Welcome Anonymous


Membership:
Latest: patrad69
New Today: 0
New Yesterday: 0
Overall: 13133

People Online:
Members: 0
Visitors: 345
BOT: 1
Total: 346
Who Is Where:
 Visitors:
01: Forums
02: Forums
03: Forums
04: Forums
05: Forums
06: Forums
07: Home
08: Forums
09: Forums
10: Forums
11: Home
12: Forums
13: Forums
14: Forums
15: Forums
16: Forums
17: Forums
18: Forums
19: Forums
20: Forums
21: Forums
22: Forums
23: Forums
24: Forums
25: Home
26: Forums
27: Forums
28: Forums
29: Forums
30: Home
31: Forums
32: Forums
33: Home
34: Home
35: Forums
36: Your Account
37: Forums
38: Forums
39: Forums
40: Forums
41: Forums
42: Forums
43: Forums
44: Forums
45: Forums
46: Forums
47: Forums
48: Your Account
49: Forums
50: Forums
51: Forums
52: Forums
53: Forums
54: Forums
55: Forums
56: Forums
57: Forums
58: Home
59: Forums
60: Forums
61: Forums
62: Forums
63: Forums
64: Forums
65: Forums
66: Forums
67: Home
68: Forums
69: Forums
70: Home
71: Forums
72: Forums
73: Forums
74: Forums
75: Forums
76: Forums
77: Forums
78: Forums
79: Forums
80: Forums
81: Forums
82: Forums
83: Home
84: Forums
85: Forums
86: Forums
87: Forums
88: Home
89: Forums
90: Forums
91: Forums
92: Your Account
93: News
94: Forums
95: Forums
96: Forums
97: Forums
98: Forums
99: Home
100: Home
101: Forums
102: Forums
103: Forums
104: Forums
105: Forums
106: Forums
107: Forums
108: Your Account
109: Your Account
110: Forums
111: Home
112: Forums
113: Forums
114: Forums
115: Forums
116: Forums
117: Forums
118: Forums
119: Forums
120: Home
121: Home
122: Home
123: Forums
124: Forums
125: Forums
126: Forums
127: Forums
128: Home
129: Home
130: Forums
131: Forums
132: Forums
133: Forums
134: Photo Albums
135: Forums
136: Forums
137: Forums
138: Forums
139: Forums
140: Forums
141: Photo Albums
142: Forums
143: Forums
144: Forums
145: Forums
146: Forums
147: Forums
148: Forums
149: Forums
150: Forums
151: Forums
152: Forums
153: Forums
154: Forums
155: Forums
156: Home
157: Forums
158: Forums
159: Forums
160: Forums
161: Forums
162: Forums
163: Forums
164: Forums
165: Forums
166: Forums
167: Forums
168: Forums
169: Forums
170: Home
171: Forums
172: Forums
173: Forums
174: Home
175: Forums
176: Forums
177: Forums
178: Forums
179: Forums
180: Forums
181: Forums
182: Forums
183: Forums
184: Forums
185: Forums
186: Forums
187: Forums
188: Forums
189: Forums
190: Forums
191: Forums
192: Home
193: Forums
194: Forums
195: Forums
196: Forums
197: Forums
198: Home
199: Forums
200: Home
201: Forums
202: Forums
203: Forums
204: Forums
205: Forums
206: Forums
207: Forums
208: Forums
209: Home
210: Home
211: Home
212: Forums
213: Home
214: Forums
215: Home
216: Forums
217: Forums
218: Forums
219: Forums
220: Forums
221: Home
222: Forums
223: Home
224: Forums
225: Forums
226: Forums
227: Forums
228: Forums
229: Forums
230: Forums
231: Home
232: Home
233: Forums
234: Forums
235: Forums
236: Forums
237: Home
238: Home
239: Forums
240: Home
241: Forums
242: Forums
243: Forums
244: Forums
245: Forums
246: Home
247: Forums
248: Forums
249: Forums
250: Forums
251: Forums
252: Forums
253: Forums
254: Forums
255: Forums
256: Forums
257: Forums
258: Forums
259: Forums
260: Forums
261: Forums
262: Forums
263: Forums
264: Forums
265: Forums
266: Forums
267: Forums
268: Home
269: Forums
270: Forums
271: Forums
272: Forums
273: Forums
274: Forums
275: Home
276: Home
277: Forums
278: Forums
279: Forums
280: Forums
281: Forums
282: Forums
283: Forums
284: Forums
285: Forums
286: Forums
287: Forums
288: Forums
289: Home
290: Home
291: Home
292: Home
293: Home
294: Forums
295: Forums
296: Forums
297: Forums
298: Forums
299: Forums
300: Home
301: Forums
302: Forums
303: Your Account
304: Forums
305: Your Account
306: Forums
307: Forums
308: Forums
309: Forums
310: Home
311: Forums
312: Forums
313: Forums
314: Forums
315: Forums
316: Forums
317: Forums
318: Forums
319: Forums
320: Forums
321: Forums
322: Members List
323: Forums
324: Forums
325: Home
326: Forums
327: Forums
328: Forums
329: Forums
330: Forums
331: Forums
332: Forums
333: Forums
334: Forums
335: Forums
336: Home
337: Forums
338: Forums
339: Forums
340: Home
341: Forums
342: Forums
343: Home
344: Home
345: Forums
  BOT:
01: Home

Staff Online:

No staff members are online!
 

Coppermine Stats
Photo Albums
 Albums: 308
 Pictures: 2455
  · Views: 824764
  · Votes: 1316
  · Comments: 85
 

AAADD- KNOW THE SYMPTOMS
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
Go to page 1, 2, 3  Next
Post new topic   Reply to topic   Printer Friendly Page    Forum Index » Jokes & Humor

View previous topic :: View next topic  
Author Message
Vince
Site Admin
Site Admin


Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 15728
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Fri May 04, 2007 4:27 am    Post subject: AAADD- KNOW THE SYMPTOMS Reply with quote

----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Thank goodness there's a name for this disorder.
Somehow I feel better, even though I have it!!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Recently, I was diagnosed with A.A.A.D.D. - Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder.

This is how it manifests:

I decide to water my garden.

As I turn on the hose in the driveway, I look over at my car and decide it needs washing.

As I start toward the garage, I notice mail on the porch table that I brought up from the mail box earlier.

I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car.

I lay my car keys on the table, put the junk mail in the garbage can under the table, and notice that the can is full.

So, I decide to put the bills back on the table and take out the garbage first.

But then I think, since I'm going to be near the mailbox when I take out the garbage anyway, I may as well pay the bills first.

I take my check book off the table, and see that there is only one check left.

My extra checks are in my desk in the study, so I go inside the house to my desk where I find the can of Coke I'd been drinking.

I'm going to look for my checks, but first I need to push the Coke aside
so that I don't accidentally knock it over.

The Coke is getting warm, and I decide to put it in the refrigerator to keep it cold.

As I head toward the kitchen with the Coke, a vase of flowers on the counter catches my eye--they need water.

I put the Coke on the counter and discover my reading glasses that I've been searching for all morning.

I decide I better put them back on my desk, but first I'm going to water the flowers.

I set the glasses back down on the counter, fill a container with water and suddenly spot the TV remote.

Someone left it on the kitchen table.

I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV, I'll be looking for the remote, but I won't remember that it's on the kitchen table, so I decide to put it back in the den where it belongs, but first I'll water the flowers.

I pour some water in the flowers, but quite a bit of it spills on the floor.

So, I set the remote back on the table, get some towels and wipe up the spill.

Then, I head down the hall trying to remember what I was planning to do.

At the end of the day:

the car isn't washed

the bills aren't paid

there is a warm can of Coke sitting on the counter

the flowers don't have enough water,

there is still only 1 check in my check book,

I can't find the remote,

I can't find my glasses,

and I don't remember what I did with the car keys.

Then, when I try to figure out why nothing got done today, I'm really baffled because I know I was busy all damn day, and I'm really tired.

I realize this is a serious problem, and I'll try to get some help for it, but first I'll check my e-mail....

Do me a favor.

Forward this message to everyone you know, because I don't remember who the hell I've sent it to. Confused

Cheers, Vince

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
Back to top
View user's profile AIM Address MSN Messenger Yahoo Messenger Photo Gallery
Bushmaster
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jun 12, 2005
Posts: 11395
Location: Ava, Missouri

PostPosted: Fri May 04, 2007 7:00 am    Post subject: Re: AAADD- KNOW THE SYMPTOMS Reply with quote

Hummmm....Something like "I'm lost...I've gone to find myself...If I should return before I get back...Please have me wait..."

Now where was I...??

_________________
I have one nerve left and yer standin' on it...

DEMOCRACY Two wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for lunch...
LIBERTY A well armed sheep contesting the outcome of the vote...
Back to top
View user's profile
SwampFox
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jul 15, 2005
Posts: 1040
Location: Destin, Florida

PostPosted: Fri May 04, 2007 8:18 am    Post subject: Re: AAADD- KNOW THE SYMPTOMS Reply with quote

You are in MO.... I think, but then again, I really do not know, cause I can't remember, at least I don't think I can remember,...... uh, what was that we were talking about, anyway.

Where are my glasses? Oh, here on my face....... Zzzzzzzz nap time. Sad
Ed

_________________
The inherent vice of capitalism is the unequal sharing of the blessings. The inherent blessing of socialism is the equal sharing of misery.
-Winston Churchill
Back to top
View user's profile Photo Gallery
tracker
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Nov 08, 2006
Posts: 1175
Location: Manitoba, Canada

PostPosted: Fri May 04, 2007 8:56 am    Post subject: Re: AAADD- KNOW THE SYMPTOMS Reply with quote

I was going to give myself a call to find out where the heck I am, but figured I wouldn't answer anyway and then realized that I can't find my cell phone on top of it.

_________________
"If God hadn't meant for man to eat animals, he wouldn't have made them out of meat!"
Back to top
View user's profile
keetoowah
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Mar 20, 2007
Posts: 691
Location: Deep in the mountains of Montana

PostPosted: Fri May 04, 2007 10:58 am    Post subject: Re: AAADD- KNOW THE SYMPTOMS Reply with quote

if you found it what would you call yourself??? hmmmm

_________________
If you shoot at mimes, should you use a silencer?
Back to top
View user's profile
tracker
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Nov 08, 2006
Posts: 1175
Location: Manitoba, Canada

PostPosted: Fri May 04, 2007 11:01 am    Post subject: Re: AAADD- KNOW THE SYMPTOMS Reply with quote

Yeah, but then I probably wouldn't answer anyway, cuz I know what I'd want to talk about and I don't really want to talk about that.

_________________
"If God hadn't meant for man to eat animals, he wouldn't have made them out of meat!"
Back to top
View user's profile
Bushmaster
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jun 12, 2005
Posts: 11395
Location: Ava, Missouri

PostPosted: Fri May 04, 2007 1:14 pm    Post subject: Re: AAADD- KNOW THE SYMPTOMS Reply with quote

I think I need an asprin...Make that two...

_________________
I have one nerve left and yer standin' on it...

DEMOCRACY Two wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for lunch...
LIBERTY A well armed sheep contesting the outcome of the vote...
Back to top
View user's profile
tracker
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Nov 08, 2006
Posts: 1175
Location: Manitoba, Canada

PostPosted: Fri May 04, 2007 1:17 pm    Post subject: Re: AAADD- KNOW THE SYMPTOMS Reply with quote

Very Happy good luck finding 'em Very Happy

_________________
"If God hadn't meant for man to eat animals, he wouldn't have made them out of meat!"
Back to top
View user's profile
Bushmaster
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jun 12, 2005
Posts: 11395
Location: Ava, Missouri

PostPosted: Fri May 04, 2007 1:30 pm    Post subject: Re: AAADD- KNOW THE SYMPTOMS Reply with quote

Got'em right here...

_________________
I have one nerve left and yer standin' on it...

DEMOCRACY Two wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for lunch...
LIBERTY A well armed sheep contesting the outcome of the vote...
Back to top
View user's profile
rdncktink
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Mar 02, 2007
Posts: 476
Location: Hwaseong, South Korea

PostPosted: Fri May 04, 2007 4:08 pm    Post subject: Re: AAADD- KNOW THE SYMPTOMS Reply with quote

I called my cell phone looking for my cell phone the other day but dang it the line was busy. Guess I should use the house phone next time.

_________________
Don't whine how bad your country is until you live in another.
Back to top
View user's profile AIM Address Yahoo Messenger
1895ss
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jul 21, 2005
Posts: 2612
Location: Not Here...!!

PostPosted: Fri May 04, 2007 6:38 pm    Post subject: Re: AAADD- KNOW THE SYMPTOMS Reply with quote

huh............ ! Shocked Shocked Confused Laughing

_________________
A cruel truth is much more desirable than a really nice lie.
'Tis far better to walk alone than to follow a crowd or an a**hole going the wrong way.
Back to top
View user's profile Send e-mail
Bushmaster
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jun 12, 2005
Posts: 11395
Location: Ava, Missouri

PostPosted: Fri May 04, 2007 6:41 pm    Post subject: Re: AAADD- KNOW THE SYMPTOMS Reply with quote

It's a california thing. 1895zz...A california thing...

_________________
I have one nerve left and yer standin' on it...

DEMOCRACY Two wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for lunch...
LIBERTY A well armed sheep contesting the outcome of the vote...
Back to top
View user's profile
1895ss
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jul 21, 2005
Posts: 2612
Location: Not Here...!!

PostPosted: Fri May 04, 2007 6:45 pm    Post subject: Re: AAADD- KNOW THE SYMPTOMS Reply with quote

Oh........ OK????????? Confused

_________________
A cruel truth is much more desirable than a really nice lie.
'Tis far better to walk alone than to follow a crowd or an a**hole going the wrong way.
Back to top
View user's profile Send e-mail
rdncktink
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Mar 02, 2007
Posts: 476
Location: Hwaseong, South Korea

PostPosted: Fri May 04, 2007 7:37 pm    Post subject: Re: AAADD- KNOW THE SYMPTOMS Reply with quote

Bushmaster wrote:
It's a california thing. 1895zz...A california thing...
That I will say is a California thing or more of a blond thing I think. Which well since I'm not blond any more (lost the bottle) guess it's the California thing. Dang what was I going to say. ........... Oh ya it was bad day and well it's a California thing. I live to close to so-cal I guess.

_________________
Don't whine how bad your country is until you live in another.
Back to top
View user's profile AIM Address Yahoo Messenger
Arron
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Nov 20, 2006
Posts: 352
Location: Cen.Iowa, by way of SWIowa

PostPosted: Wed May 16, 2007 9:19 am    Post subject: Re: AAADD- KNOW THE SYMPTOMS Reply with quote

I work alone at work most of the time so I have time to "ponder" things and I have come up the facts of my life.
I have conversations with myself because I am the only one who cares about what I am talking and I am the only one who even knows what it was I was talking about in the first place and I am the only one who can give me anything remotely resembling a correct answer. So why in the world would I want to talk to anyone ELSE???
Back to top
View user's profile
Display posts from previous:   
Post new topic   Reply to topic   Printer Friendly Page    Forum Index » Jokes & Humor
Page 1 of 3
All times are GMT - 7 Hours
Go to page 1, 2, 3  Next



Jump to:  


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum
You cannot attach files in this forum
You cannot download files in this forum


Valid CSS! Valid HTML 4.01!
Click to check if this page is realy HTML 4.01 compliant for speed :)

All logos and trademarks in this site are property of HuntingNut.com.
The comments are property of their posters, all the rest © 2011 by HuntingNut.com
Interactive software released under GNU GPL, Code Credits, Privacy Policy

.: Upgraded to DragonFly 9.2 by *Dizfunkshunal* :.