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ENJOY - A Blonde's Year in Review
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
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Vince
Site Admin
Site Admin


Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 15725
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA
PostPosted: Thu May 14, 2015 8:23 pm    Post subject: ENJOY - A Blonde's Year in Review Reply with quote
January
Took new scarf back to store because it was too tight.

February
Fired from pharmacy job for failing to print labels.....
Helllloooo!!!.......bottles won't fit in printer!!!

March
Got really excited.....finished jigsaw puzzle in 6 months.....
Box said ' 2-4 years!'

April
Trapped on escalator for hours ...
Power went out!!!

May
Tried to make Kool-Aid.....wrong instructions....
8 cups of water won't fit into those little packets!!!

June
Tried to go water skiing.......
Couldn't find a lake with a slope.

July
Lost breast stroke swimming competition.....
Learned later that the other swimmers cheated- they used their arms!!!

August
Got locked out of my car in rain storm.....
Darn car filled up with water because convertible top was open.

September
The capital of California is 'C'.....isn't it???

October
Hate M & M's.....They are so hard to peel.

November
Baked Thanksgiving turkey for 4 1/2 days ...
Instructions said bake 1 hour per pound and I weigh 108!!

December
Couldn't call 911.
'Duh'.....there's no 'eleven' button on the stupid phone!!!

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
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RePete
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Aug 15, 2005
Posts: 1035
Location: Gods Country
PostPosted: Fri May 15, 2015 4:12 am    Post subject: Re: ENJOY - A Blonde's Year in Review Reply with quote
The Wave

_________________
Proud member of the WTFDTSG Club.

Stercus Accidit = Sh*t Happens in Latin.

Nice try = You Suck spelled different.

My parents spanked me as a child. As a result, I now suffer from a psychological condition known as RESPECT FOR OTHERS.
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Elvis
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jul 27, 2008
Posts: 9261
Location: south island New Zealand
PostPosted: Fri May 15, 2015 2:26 pm    Post subject: Re: ENJOY - A Blonde's Year in Review Reply with quote
your crown is safe....

_________________
You shot it You pluck it !
Them who eats the most duck eats the most feathers!
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lesterg3
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Nov 30, 2008
Posts: 1328
Location: Dixie
PostPosted: Sat May 16, 2015 12:12 pm    Post subject: Re: ENJOY - A Blonde's Year in Review Reply with quote
Very funny, but sound more like liberal jokes than blonde jokes.

_________________
"A democracy is nothing more than mob rule, where fifty-one percent of the people may take away the rights of the other forty-nine. "--Thomas Jefferson

The strongest reason for the people to retain the right to keep and bear arms is, as a last resort, to protect themselves against tyranny in government. -- Thomas Jefferson

"Americans have the right and advantage of being armed - unlike the citizens of other countries whose governments are afraid to trust the people with arms."--James Madison

"The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants." Thomas Jefferson.

NRA Life Member
Vietnam War Vet 68-69
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