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The Bull
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
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Vince
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Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 15721
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA
PostPosted: Wed Jul 23, 2014 1:01 am    Post subject: The Bull Reply with quote
I recently spent $6,500 on a young registered Black Angus bull. I put him out with the herd but he just ate grass and wouldn't even look at a cow. I was beginning to think I had paid more for that bull than he was worth.
Anyhow, I had the Vet come and have a look at him. He said the bull was very healthy, but possibly just a little young, so he gave me some pills to feed him once per day.

The bull started to service the cows within two days, all my cows! He even broke through the fence and bred with all of my neighbor's cows! He's like a machine!



I don't know what was in the pills the Vet gave him but they kind of taste like peppermint. Surprised

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)

Last edited by Vince on Wed Jul 23, 2014 5:53 am; edited 1 time in total
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Elvis
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Joined: Jul 27, 2008
Posts: 9258
Location: south island New Zealand
PostPosted: Wed Jul 23, 2014 1:08 am    Post subject: Re: The Bull Reply with quote
lock up your Grandmas Vince is on the prowl!!!!

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You shot it You pluck it !
Them who eats the most duck eats the most feathers!
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Vince
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Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 15721
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA
PostPosted: Wed Jul 23, 2014 5:55 am    Post subject: Re: The Bull Reply with quote
Elvis wrote:
lock up your Grandmas Vince is on the prowl!!!!

Confused Shocked wtf Laughing Laughing

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
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slimjim
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Joined: May 16, 2009
Posts: 8316
Location: Fort Worth TX
PostPosted: Wed Jul 23, 2014 8:37 am    Post subject: Re: The Bull Reply with quote
Vince, can your heart take it?

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"To anger a conservative, lie to him. To anger a liberal, tell him the truth." - Theodore Roosevelt

"The world is a dangerous place to live; not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it." - Albert Einstein
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lesterg3
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Joined: Nov 30, 2008
Posts: 1328
Location: Dixie
PostPosted: Wed Jul 23, 2014 10:40 am    Post subject: Re: The Bull Reply with quote
I'll take a couple hundred. Send at once, please.

_________________
"A democracy is nothing more than mob rule, where fifty-one percent of the people may take away the rights of the other forty-nine. "--Thomas Jefferson

The strongest reason for the people to retain the right to keep and bear arms is, as a last resort, to protect themselves against tyranny in government. -- Thomas Jefferson

"Americans have the right and advantage of being armed - unlike the citizens of other countries whose governments are afraid to trust the people with arms."--James Madison

"The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants." Thomas Jefferson.

NRA Life Member
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gelandangan
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Joined: May 07, 2006
Posts: 6400
Location: Sydney Australia
PostPosted: Wed Jul 23, 2014 2:20 pm    Post subject: Re: The Bull Reply with quote
Haha

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A straight line is the shortest distance between two points.
A smile is the shortest distance between two people.

Do - Not try!


gelandangan.weebly.com/
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Aloysius
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Joined: Nov 03, 2009
Posts: 2440
Location: B., Belgium
PostPosted: Thu Jul 24, 2014 3:03 am    Post subject: Re: The Bull Reply with quote
lesterg3 wrote:
I'll take a couple hundred. Send at once, please.

are the cows complaining?

But be carefull, 'they' live on the other side of the world, what goes 'up' overthere is going 'down' here...

Smile
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Vince
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Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 15721
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA
PostPosted: Thu Jul 24, 2014 3:07 am    Post subject: Re: The Bull Reply with quote
Heart us doing well Slim...so far mate. No complaints from the cows...the wimmens might be a different thing though.

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
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Bushmaster
Super Member
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Joined: Jun 12, 2005
Posts: 11394
Location: Ava, Missouri
PostPosted: Thu Jul 24, 2014 8:19 am    Post subject: Re: The Bull Reply with quote
And the sheep will be jealous...

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I have one nerve left and yer standin' on it...

DEMOCRACY Two wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for lunch...
LIBERTY A well armed sheep contesting the outcome of the vote...
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gelandangan
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Joined: May 07, 2006
Posts: 6400
Location: Sydney Australia
PostPosted: Thu Jul 24, 2014 2:17 pm    Post subject: Re: The Bull Reply with quote
You got the wrong island Bushy..

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A straight line is the shortest distance between two points.
A smile is the shortest distance between two people.

Do - Not try!


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Ominivision1
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Joined: Sep 20, 2010
Posts: 2984
Location: Iowa
PostPosted: Thu Jul 24, 2014 2:17 pm    Post subject: Re: The Bull Reply with quote
Bushmaster wrote:
And the sheep will be jealous...

Very Happy Very Happy

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Limitations are but boundaries created inside our minds.
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lesterg3
Super Member
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Joined: Nov 30, 2008
Posts: 1328
Location: Dixie
PostPosted: Thu Jul 24, 2014 3:18 pm    Post subject: Re: The Bull Reply with quote
Bushy was probably referring to Montana, and Wyoming. Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy

_________________
"A democracy is nothing more than mob rule, where fifty-one percent of the people may take away the rights of the other forty-nine. "--Thomas Jefferson

The strongest reason for the people to retain the right to keep and bear arms is, as a last resort, to protect themselves against tyranny in government. -- Thomas Jefferson

"Americans have the right and advantage of being armed - unlike the citizens of other countries whose governments are afraid to trust the people with arms."--James Madison

"The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants." Thomas Jefferson.

NRA Life Member
Vietnam War Vet 68-69
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