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Farms Wife Wisdom
Discussions run-amok, innane banter it all goes here
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lesterg3
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PostPosted: Fri Nov 20, 2015 12:27 pm    Post subject: Farms Wife Wisdom Reply with quote

Thought this was good.

Wise Advice from a Farmer's Wife

Whenever you return a borrowed pie pan, make sure it's got a warm pie in it.
Invite lots of folks to supper. You can always add more water to the soup.
There's no such thing as woman's work on a farm. There's just work.
Make home a happy place for the children. Everybody returns to their happy place.
Always keep a small light on in the kitchen window at night.
If your man gets his truck stuck in the field, don't go in after him. Throw him a rope and pull him out with the tractor.
Keep the kerosene lamp away from the the milk cow's leg.
It's a whole lot easier to get breakfast from a chicken than a pig.
Always pat the chickens when you take their eggs.
It's easy to clean an empty house, but hard to live in one.
All children spill milk. Learn to smile and wipe it up.
Homemade's always better'n store bought.
A tongue's like a knife. The sharper it is the deeper it cuts.
A good neighbor always knows when to visit and when to leave.
A city dog wants to run out the door, but a country dog stays on the porch 'cause he's not fenced-in.
Always light birthday candles from the middle outward.
Nothin' gets the frustrations out better'n splittn' wood.
The longer dress hem, the more trusting the husband.
Enjoy doing your children's laundry. Some day they'll be gone.
You'll never catch a runnin' chicken but if you throw seed around the back door you'll have a skillet full by supper.
Biscuits brown better with a little butter brushed on 'em.
Check your shoelaces before runnin' to help somebody.
Visit old people who can't get out. Some day you'll be one.
The softer you talk, the closer folks'll listen.
The colder the outhouse, the warmer the bed.

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"A democracy is nothing more than mob rule, where fifty-one percent of the people may take away the rights of the other forty-nine. "--Thomas Jefferson

The strongest reason for the people to retain the right to keep and bear arms is, as a last resort, to protect themselves against tyranny in government. -- Thomas Jefferson

"Americans have the right and advantage of being armed - unlike the citizens of other countries whose governments are afraid to trust the people with arms."--James Madison

"The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants." Thomas Jefferson.

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Elvis
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PostPosted: Fri Nov 20, 2015 1:55 pm    Post subject: Re: Farms Wife Wisdom Reply with quote

wow there sure are a lot of gems in that lot.

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slimjim
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PostPosted: Fri Nov 20, 2015 3:12 pm    Post subject: Re: Farms Wife Wisdom Reply with quote

I agree, Aloys. Insightful and worth remembering.

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Aloysius
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PostPosted: Sat Nov 21, 2015 2:02 am    Post subject: Re: Farms Wife Wisdom Reply with quote

slimjim wrote:
I agree, Aloys. Insightful and worth remembering.


???

teasing an old man, are you? Smile
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Vince
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PostPosted: Sat Nov 21, 2015 3:58 am    Post subject: Re: Farms Wife Wisdom Reply with quote

Aloysius wrote:
slimjim wrote:
I agree, Aloys. Insightful and worth remembering.


???

teasing an old man, are you? Smile

Haha Haha Haha Haha

That's a damn fine list of good advice Lester Very Happy Very Happy ...thanks mate.

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Suzanne
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PostPosted: Sat Nov 21, 2015 8:59 am    Post subject: Re: Farms Wife Wisdom Reply with quote

Reminds me of home. I've been on and around farms all my life, you can't beat that way of living. Wish I was on one now. Feeding the horses left over corn on the cob and listening to them eat and crunch, watching the steam rise off their back on a cold day. Putting fly powder on a new born calf and laying down with it in a sunny pasture. One time in my life I lived near a dairy and it was fun to go over there in the morning when the girls were called in. You had to stand out of their way and they seemed like giants to me as a kid. The smell of fresh milk and feeding the calves will always be a memorable thing to me. Always amazed me the amount of milk they gave too. Take a jar of milk home and put it in the fridge to separate then skim the heavy cream off for your bowl of cornflakes. It was such a treat.


Suz

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Bushmaster
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PostPosted: Sat Nov 21, 2015 9:23 am    Post subject: Re: Farms Wife Wisdom Reply with quote

And Suz brings back memories...

Lester and Suz...I lived those times. Suz did leave out trying to ride the neighbor's stock.

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DEMOCRACY Two wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for lunch...
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lesterg3
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PostPosted: Sat Nov 21, 2015 9:31 am    Post subject: Re: Farms Wife Wisdom Reply with quote

Busy, I still have splinters in my backside from our out house, right outside the rail car someone converted into a house. First indoor toilet I used was when we moved to Memphis Naval Station for some training for my dad. I did more chasing than actual riding, but it was fun.

_________________
"A democracy is nothing more than mob rule, where fifty-one percent of the people may take away the rights of the other forty-nine. "--Thomas Jefferson

The strongest reason for the people to retain the right to keep and bear arms is, as a last resort, to protect themselves against tyranny in government. -- Thomas Jefferson

"Americans have the right and advantage of being armed - unlike the citizens of other countries whose governments are afraid to trust the people with arms."--James Madison

"The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants." Thomas Jefferson.

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Bushmaster
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PostPosted: Sun Nov 22, 2015 9:48 am    Post subject: Re: Farms Wife Wisdom Reply with quote

Splinters? Hell My dad [years ago] placed one of them new fangled porcelain jobbies over the hole. Worked great and no splinters.

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DEMOCRACY Two wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for lunch...
LIBERTY A well armed sheep contesting the outcome of the vote...
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lesterg3
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PostPosted: Sun Nov 22, 2015 10:16 am    Post subject: Re: Farms Wife Wisdom Reply with quote

We were a Navy family, if we wanted porcelain we had to go to the base.

_________________
"A democracy is nothing more than mob rule, where fifty-one percent of the people may take away the rights of the other forty-nine. "--Thomas Jefferson

The strongest reason for the people to retain the right to keep and bear arms is, as a last resort, to protect themselves against tyranny in government. -- Thomas Jefferson

"Americans have the right and advantage of being armed - unlike the citizens of other countries whose governments are afraid to trust the people with arms."--James Madison

"The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants." Thomas Jefferson.

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Vince
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PostPosted: Sun Nov 22, 2015 11:35 pm    Post subject: Re: Farms Wife Wisdom Reply with quote

All this talk about outhouses and long drops etc brings the following to mind...

Ma was in the kitchen fiddling around when she hollers out.... "Pa! You need to go out and fix the outhouse!"

Pa replies, "There ain't nuthin wrong with the outhouse."

Ma yells back, "Yes there is, now git out there and fix it."

So......Pa mosies out to the outhouse, looks around and yells back, "Ma! There ain't nuthin wrong with the outhouse!"

Ma replies, "Stick yur head in the hole!"

Pa yells back, "I ain't stickin my head in that hole!"

Ma says, "Ya have to stick yur head in the hole to see what to fix."

So with that, Pa sticks his head in the hole, looks around and yells back, "Ma! There ain't nuthin wrong with this outhouse!" Confused Scratch Scratch

Ma hollers back, "Now take your head out of the hole!"

Pa proceeds to pull his head out of the hole, then starts yelling, "Ma! Help! My beard is stuck in the cracks in the toilet seat!" wtf Shocked Mad Mad

To which Ma replies, "Hurt's, don't it ?!" Mad Mad Mad

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Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
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lesterg3
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PostPosted: Mon Nov 23, 2015 4:11 am    Post subject: Re: Farms Wife Wisdom Reply with quote

Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy

_________________
"A democracy is nothing more than mob rule, where fifty-one percent of the people may take away the rights of the other forty-nine. "--Thomas Jefferson

The strongest reason for the people to retain the right to keep and bear arms is, as a last resort, to protect themselves against tyranny in government. -- Thomas Jefferson

"Americans have the right and advantage of being armed - unlike the citizens of other countries whose governments are afraid to trust the people with arms."--James Madison

"The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants." Thomas Jefferson.

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PaulS
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PostPosted: Tue Nov 24, 2015 9:12 pm    Post subject: Re: Farms Wife Wisdom Reply with quote

Good communication is necessary to a long and happy marriage...

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