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Forum FAQ

A helping hand.
Jokes, funny stories and general humor

Forum Index » Jokes & Humor

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Author

Message

gelandangan
Super Member

Joined: May 07, 2006
Posts: 6403
Location: Sydney Australia

Posted: Thu Jun 02, 2016 4:20 pm Post subject: A helping hand.

Saw this on the other forum.. too good not to share Very Happy

==========================================
As I was walking home this week worrying about all the crap going on in Washington, Ottawa, London, Moscow, Ukraine etc. and at how my life was falling apart, I saw a yard sign that said:

NEED HELP?
CALL JESUS
1-800-005-3787

Out of curiosity and desperation, I did.

A Mexican showed up with a lawnmower.

_________________
A straight line is the shortest distance between two points.
A smile is the shortest distance between two people.

Do - Not try!

gelandangan.weebly.com/

Tremblay
Super Member

Joined: Oct 08, 2007
Posts: 2656
Location: Malta, Montana

Posted: Thu Jun 02, 2016 6:02 pm Post subject: Re: A helping hand.
Hee Haw _________________ Patriotism is supporting your country all the time, and your government when it deserves it. - Mark Twain Never argue with a stupid person ,cause they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience. Mark Twwain

Vince
Site Admin

Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 15727
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

Posted: Thu Jun 02, 2016 8:43 pm Post subject: Re: A helping hand.
_________________ Cheers, Vince Illegitimi non carborundum (Never let the bastards grind you down) Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God. "Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta." (Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)

Suzanne
Super Member

Joined: Jun 27, 2009
Posts: 3323
Location: Eugene, Oregon

Posted: Fri Jun 03, 2016 6:20 am Post subject: Re: A helping hand.
That's pronounced 'Hey-Suz' ya know.... Suz _________________ May the moon keep you centered, May the sun keep you dancing, And the stars shed light on your dreams.

Bushmaster
Super Member

Joined: Jun 12, 2005
Posts: 11395
Location: Ava, Missouri

Posted: Fri Jun 03, 2016 7:40 am Post subject: Re: A helping hand.
Hey-Suz'?? _________________ I have one nerve left and yer standin' on it... DEMOCRACY Two wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for lunch... LIBERTY A well armed sheep contesting the outcome of the vote...

tikkat3
Super Member

Joined: Jul 30, 2006
Posts: 800

Posted: Fri Jun 03, 2016 7:07 pm Post subject: Re: A helping hand.
"Jesus"

Suzanne
Super Member

Joined: Jun 27, 2009
Posts: 3323
Location: Eugene, Oregon

Posted: Sat Jun 04, 2016 6:40 am Post subject: Re: A helping hand.
What? _________________ May the moon keep you centered, May the sun keep you dancing, And the stars shed light on your dreams.

lesterg3
Super Member

Joined: Nov 30, 2008
Posts: 1328
Location: Dixie

Posted: Sat Jun 04, 2016 7:54 am Post subject: Re: A helping hand.

_________________
"A democracy is nothing more than mob rule, where fifty-one percent of the people may take away the rights of the other forty-nine. "--Thomas Jefferson

The strongest reason for the people to retain the right to keep and bear arms is, as a last resort, to protect themselves against tyranny in government. -- Thomas Jefferson

"Americans have the right and advantage of being armed - unlike the citizens of other countries whose governments are afraid to trust the people with arms."--James Madison

"The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants." Thomas Jefferson.

NRA Life Member
Vietnam War Vet 68-69

Elvis
Super Member

Joined: Jul 27, 2008
Posts: 9261
Location: south island New Zealand

Posted: Sun Jun 05, 2016 12:10 am Post subject: Re: A helping hand.
_________________ You shot it You pluck it ! Them who eats the most duck eats the most feathers!

gelandangan
Super Member

Joined: May 07, 2006
Posts: 6403
Location: Sydney Australia

Posted: Sun Jun 05, 2016 3:17 am Post subject: Re: A helping hand.
Hey-Suz Kwaist!! _________________ A straight line is the shortest distance between two points. A smile is the shortest distance between two people. Do - Not try! gelandangan.weebly.com/

Suzanne
Super Member

Joined: Jun 27, 2009
Posts: 3323
Location: Eugene, Oregon

Posted: Sun Jun 05, 2016 7:06 am Post subject: Re: A helping hand.
Goot won Gelan!! Suz _________________ May the moon keep you centered, May the sun keep you dancing, And the stars shed light on your dreams.

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