HuntingNut
HuntingNut
   Login or Register
HomeCommunity ForumsPhoto AlbumsRegister
     
 

User Info

Welcome Anonymous

Nickname
Password

Membership:
Latest: waidmannsheilsafaris
New Today: 0
New Yesterday: 0
Overall: 13234

People Online:
Members: 0
Visitors: 96
Bots: 2
Staff: 0
Staff Online:

No staff members are online!
 

Coppermine Stats
Photo Albums
 Albums: 315
 Pictures: 2482
  · Views: 854885
  · Votes: 1316
  · Comments: 85
 

Different Ways of Looking at Things
Jokes, funny stories and general humor
Post new topic   Reply to topic   Printer Friendly Page    Forum Index » Jokes & Humor

View previous topic :: View next topic  
Author Message
Vince
Site Admin
Site Admin


Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 16194
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Fri Feb 15, 2013 3:33 am    Post subject: Different Ways of Looking at Things Reply with quote

Just re-setting the standard on jokes, laughs and giggles. Very Happy Very Happy Laughing Razz


Two guys were discussing popular family trends on sex, marriage, and Family values.

Bill said, 'I didn't sleep with my wife before we got married, did you?'

Larry replied, 'I'm not sure, what was her maiden name?'
___________________________________________

A little boy went up to his father and asked:

'Dad, where did my intelligence come from?'

The father replied. 'Well, son, you must have got it from your mother, cause I still have mine.'
___________________________________________

'Mr. Clark, I have reviewed this case very carefully,' the divorce Court Judge said, 'And I've decided to give your wife $775 a week,'

'That's very fair, your honor,' the husband said. 'And every now and then I'll try to send her a few bucks myself.'
___________________________________________

A doctor examining a woman who had been rushed to the Emergency Room, took the husband aside, and said, 'I don't like the looks of your wife at all.'

'Me neither doc,' said the husband. 'But she's a great cook and really good with the kids.'
___________________________________________

An old man goes to the Wizard to ask him if he can remove a curse he has been living with for the last 40 years.

The Wizard says, 'Maybe, but you will have to tell me the exact words that were used to put the curse on you.'

The old man says without hesitation, 'I now pronounce you man and wife.'
___________________________________________

Two Reasons Why It's So Hard To Solve A Redneck Murder:

1. The DNA all matches.

2. There are no dental records.
___________________________________________

A blonde calls Delta Airlines and asks, 'Can you tell me how long it'll take to fly from San Francisco to New York City?'

The agent replies, 'Just a minute.'

'Thank you,' the blonde says, and hangs up.
___________________________________________

Two Mexican detectives were investigating the murder of Juan Gonzalez.

'How was he killed?' asked one detective.

'With a golf gun,' the other detective replied.

'A golf gun! What is a golf gun?'

'I don't know. But it sure made a hole in Juan.'
___________________________________________

Moe: 'My wife got me to believe in religion.'

Joe: 'Really?'

Moe: 'Yeah. Until I married her I didn't believe in Hell.'
___________________________________________

A man is recovering from surgery when the Surgical Nurse appears and asks him how he is feeling.

'I'm O. K. But I didn't like the four letter-words the doctor used in surgery,' he answered.

'What did he say,' asked the nurse.

'Oops!'
___________________________________________

While shopping for vacation clothes, my husband and I passed a display of bathing suits.

It had been at least ten years and twenty pounds since I had even considered buying a bathing suit, so I sought my husband's advice.

'What do you think?' I asked. 'Should I get a bikini or an all-in-one?'

'Better get a bikini,' he replied. 'You'd never get it all in one.'

He's still in intensive care.
___________________________________________

The graveside service just barely finished, when there was massive clap of thunder, followed by a tremendous bolt of lightning, accompanied by even more thunder rumbling in the distance...

The little old man looked at the pastor and calmly said, 'Well, she's there.'

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)


Last edited by Vince on Fri Feb 15, 2013 11:14 am; edited 1 time in total
Back to top
View user's profile AIM Address MSN Messenger Yahoo Messenger Photo Gallery
gelandangan
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: May 07, 2006
Posts: 6497
Location: Sydney Australia

PostPosted: Fri Feb 15, 2013 5:45 am    Post subject: Re: Different Ways of Looking at Things Reply with quote

Laughing

_________________
A straight line is the shortest distance between two points.
A smile is the shortest distance between two people.

Do - Not try!


gelandangan.weebly.com/
Back to top
View user's profile Visit poster's website
10spotterminator
Member
Member


Joined: Aug 27, 2008
Posts: 167
Location: Redmond, Oregon

PostPosted: Fri Feb 15, 2013 3:49 pm    Post subject: Re: Different Ways of Looking at Things Reply with quote

Haha Laughing ROFL

You must be a HOOT at the PUB with a list like that Vince !

Cheers

_________________
It's not whether you win or lose... It's how you place the blame .
Back to top
View user's profile
Donut Slayer
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jun 27, 2007
Posts: 596
Location: Pensacola, Florida

PostPosted: Fri Feb 15, 2013 7:52 pm    Post subject: Re: Different Ways of Looking at Things Reply with quote

ROFL ROFL Worship

_________________
Browning X-Bolt in 30'06. The work for a pet load starts again. Wink The more people I meet, the more I like my dog.
Back to top
View user's profile Send e-mail
Bushmaster
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jun 12, 2005
Posts: 11505
Location: Ava, Missouri

PostPosted: Sat Feb 16, 2013 1:13 pm    Post subject: Re: Different Ways of Looking at Things Reply with quote

Just when we think we have him "dethroned".............................

_________________
I have one nerve left and yer standin' on it...

DEMOCRACY Two wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for lunch...
LIBERTY A well armed sheep contesting the outcome of the vote...
Back to top
View user's profile
Vince
Site Admin
Site Admin


Joined: May 25, 2005
Posts: 16194
Location: Brisbane AUSTRALIA

PostPosted: Sat Feb 16, 2013 2:39 pm    Post subject: Re: Different Ways of Looking at Things Reply with quote

Cheers Cheers Laughing Laughing Laughing

_________________
Cheers, Vince Cheers

Illegitimi non carborundum
(Never let the bastards grind you down)

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

"Nulla Si Fa Senza Volonta."
(Without Commitment, Nothing Gets Done)
Back to top
View user's profile AIM Address MSN Messenger Yahoo Messenger Photo Gallery
Elvis
Super Member
Super Member


Joined: Jul 27, 2008
Posts: 9481
Location: south island New Zealand

PostPosted: Sat Feb 16, 2013 9:47 pm    Post subject: Re: Different Ways of Looking at Things Reply with quote

you the man Vince Very Happy Very Happy you the man Very Happy Very Happy

_________________
You shot it You pluck it !
Them who eats the most duck eats the most feathers!
Back to top
View user's profile
Display posts from previous:   
Post new topic   Reply to topic   Printer Friendly Page    Forum Index » Jokes & Humor
Page 1 of 1
All times are GMT - 7 Hours



Jump to:  


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum
You cannot attach files in this forum
You cannot download files in this forum


Valid CSS! Valid HTML 4.01!
Click to check if this page is realy HTML 4.01 compliant for speed :)

All logos and trademarks in this site are property of HuntingNut.com.
The comments are property of their posters, all the rest © 2011 by HuntingNut.com
Interactive software released under GNU GPL, Code Credits, Privacy Policy

.: Upgraded to DragonFly 9.2 by *Dizfunkshunal* :.